:: a little miracle in the garden

The daphne bush that's been struggling along weedily for five years or more is finally flowering! I can hardly believe it.



The brown marks are from a recent bout of frost. It's been a very mild winter though - I wonder if that's it? Or maybe it just needed time. Lots of time.

I still haven't done anything about building raised beds in the back yard. Well, I did go to the fencing place up the road at the weekend but it was shut. I'm now thinking log rolls. We'll see. I thought I'd found the ideal thing in Homebase: sturdy wooden frames hinged at the corners so they fold down flat for easy transport, and clips on the top so they can be stacked to make a higher frame. Sadly it turns out they're not for sale - they belong to the (foreign) company that ships garden supplies to Homebase. Sigh.

It's been raining heavily this week so I've been back on eBay. A breadmaker this time, a Panasonic. I've been thinking about getting one of these but they're nearly £100 new, bit too much to justify. This was £40 - second hand but looks in good nick from the photos. It hasn't arrived yet. I also got a lovely bag for guess who.



How could I see that and not buy it? She is an angel.

Depressing news locally: vandals have burnt out the wooden part of the lovely new walkway through Ferry Glen. It's the second arson attack on the path: last year they burnt the bridge. It was replaced by a metal one, not as nice but at least impervious to fire-raisers. And now this! It's quite a long stretch, and the fire also damaged surrounding trees, as you can see:



Bertie, being a drongo, thinks that because he walked on the walkway a while ago he must be able to walk on it again now, even though it looks and smells funny.

The fight-back against litter also continues. A while back I joined a group effort at the roundabout by Tesco (as a reward they gave us lunch in the staff canteen), and this inspired me to tackle a really nasty corner near my place. I've dubbed it Vodka Valley - there must have been a dozen or more one-litre empties, as well as lots of beer cans, Buckie bottles, crisp packets and Rizlas.



I'm probably going on another joint litter-picking session on Sunday. They're a nice bunch of people and it is kind of satisfying.

:: Phew

The weekend starts here! I ended up working last Sunday as well - Alistair's wife developed a terrible all-over rash in reaction to the antibiotics and had to be rushed back to hospital with a raging temperature. (She's doing a bit better now, thank goodness, but will be in hospital over this weekend too.)

I'm having tomorrow off in place of Sunday, so will have a lovely long weekend. Lots to do too.

{tech stuff}

The new laptop is still working, and I've been going through the hoops necessary to get my free Vista update. Mr Gates is determined to make me prove I have the dogged patience required for a true Windows user. First I had to fill in a form at the Acer website - serial number, special code number from the bottom of the machine, £15 for postage and then got a confirmation email. You would think that was that - but no! You have to fax your receipt to the Netherlands to prove you've bought the machine within the qualifying period. Fiiiiine. But the number on the email wasn't a fax number. Confusion at the fax machine. So I phoned the number and after beeping through the menu got to speak to a lovely French chap, who gave me the fax number (which was actually on the confirmation email when I had a really good look). So finally I got the appropriate bits of paper off to the Netherlands. And now I have six weeks to get my laptop ready for the off. Six weeks!! It can't possibly be that difficult to run off a few hundred thousand DVDs and mail them off. Ridiculous.

I do have quite a lot of preparation to do, because I've discovered that my nice new laptop has a flaw. For some unknowable reason, the drive has been formatted in FAT32 rather than NTFS. I know! Stupid. How can it possibly have a sticker on it saying "Windows Vista Premium Ready" when Vista won't install on a FAT32 disk? Duh. It means that part of the upgrade process will be a reformat. In a way that's a Good Thing, because here's another stupid thing: the drive has been split in two. I HATE this! It's just plain irritating. It means I can't have all my programs and photos and music on the default drive, I have to mess around changing the drive letter when installing things, grrr. So I'll be able to change that. But I will have to back up absolutely everything in a nice tidy way on the portable hard drive (and on the desk computer too, belt and braces) - that will probably take me six weeks, ha ha.

{/tech stuff}

I got the most fantastic present the other day - a rhubarb crown. It's a chunk split off a crown that was being divided. I'm on this Freecycle email group, and it was advertised on there, so I leapt at the chance. The donor, Jim, showed up at the door with a big, heavy rubbish bag. I'll post some photos of what was inside - it's the most amazing thing... HUGE. I said to Jim the original must have been something else and he says it is; his wife got it when she was a girl, it was part of a crown that was 40 years old. Incredible! The roots are like a tree's, thicker than my wrist. I dug a huge hole, sprinkled in plenty of organic compost and covered it over. Jim says I won't get much off it this year, but it should come away well next year.



At the weekend I'm going to start off some of my seeds, feed the roses and do some more weeding. It's been such a mild winter the weeds are rampant. The bulbs Faye gave me are starting to show their heads, and the woods are full of snowdrops. I really love spring, but the weather right now is more like what you'd expect in March, not February.

I've fallen prey to the lure of eBay! So far I've bought two tapestry kits, both for a really good price, and a ceramic coffee filter holder thingie to replace a tatty old plastic one I've been gluing together for years. The first tapestry kit I won in a last-minute bidding war - so exciting! I can see how it gets addictive. The last seconds are ticking down and you've got the winning bid, yay! I'm watching another tapestry kit and a bread-maker, but might not bother fighting down to the wire for them. I'm thinking about selling some stuff on eBay too ... see how it goes.

:: nearly there

Blimey this has been an ordeal. But all that's still to come is the PIN for my credit card. I'll ring the bank at some point and see what's happening on that score.

Best of all, my spanking new laptop arrived this morning (Friday ... see below). I was too cheap to pay for next-day delivery - sloooow delivery was free - so was amazed when it arrived. I only ordered it on Wednesday. It's a wonderful machine. It's quick, has a beautiful screen and the setup was smooth and easy. And it cost a grand total of £570 - £10 more than getting my broken Sony fixed. I did pay another £50 for a three-year warranty, it seems like a bargain. But yes, it's lovely. I was a bit downcast when I took it out of the box; compared to the slick gorgeousness of the Vaio it seemed cheap and plasticky. But once I got it going and it had whisked through its setup routine I began to bond with it.

The real "oh wow" moment was running the Aquarium screensaver: the screen resolution is breathtaking. And when you set up the Windows Media Centre there's an HD video runs that's so sharp it's scary. So now I'm happily loading all my software and files. Right at this minute I'm testing the battery life, which by the way beats the Vaio hands down: the power management system is slick and easy, and the icon says I have three hours left. Yay! I'm a happy camper.


Later (Saturday in fact - I saved yesterday's entry as a draft & never did get to finish it):
Andrew came down from Sneckie yesterday and I'd arranged to have the day off so we could have a big catchup. But I'd had to warn him I might have to go in to work at short notice and so I did. Alistair's wife is very ill; she'd been in hospital and got out yesterday, but wasn't well enough for him to leave her. It also happened that John is away this weekend. I made lunch and we had about two hours to talk before I had to race away. Andrew came into town and met me in my break and we had a drink. He was in bed already when I got home, and had to leave before I got up (he did wake me to say goodbye). He'll be back at Easter, hope we get more time then!

So today I'm having a really good rest. It's cold and wet outside, nice and snug in here. And I have a nice new toy - bliss!

:: crash bang wallop

Every now and then, something major goes haywire at exactly the worst moment possible.

Like when I was trying to sell my flat and the kitchen sink blocked up and the plumber couldn't fix it and said he would have to tear down the whole wall to get at the drains and I had to wash the dishes in the bath for a week.

Or the time when Trevor and Jenny and Liz and Ken were over from New Zealand for the festive season and while we were all away visiting Mull and Iona in the snow one of my pipes froze and burst and flooded the whole downstairs and my neighbour had to get the police to break in and turn the water off and I had to find an emergency plumber at 10pm on December 30.

Well, it's happened again. First of all, I lost all my bank cards on Sunday night. A major inconvenience but not a disaster (not like the time my credit card was stolen right out of my purse in Sainsburys and the thief went on a spending spree before I could get to a phone). I called the bank, cancelled the cards and ordered new ones, and went to bed in a relaxed mood.

When I got up the next morning I found that my laptop had died in the night. My beautiful Sony Vaio, only 16 months old, stone dead. It only had a year's warranty, so this really is a disaster. Sony is showing its true colours - it cost me 35p a minute to call the helpline, for example - it's local rates when you're under warranty. I called the Sony Centre and described the tests I'd done & they said to bring it in. So I drove all the way in, paid for parking and waited ... and guess what they said? It's dead. Call the helpline.

The helpline (at a cost of almost £6) told me it was a board fault and would cost £560 to fix. They have a tiered charge system and this is the highest level of fault. For £560 I can get a whole new laptop, I wailed. Yes, you probably can, said the helpline boy. Oh, and there's another thing: Sony won't guarantee it won't have to wipe the hard drive.

So now I'm in a quandry. I can get a new laptop for that much, but it wouldn't be so gorgeous and sleek and lovely. But then if I get Sony to fix my dead one, it might break down again - maybe it's a lemon. And whatever I do, I have to first get my files off the broken computer (yeah, yeah, I know I should have backed up every day, I'm an idiot). And I can't do anything about that because I've got no cards and no money.

So actually, it turns out that losing my cards wasn't such a bad thing after all. It has forced me to think long and hard about the whole thing. I've moved my old desktop back downstairs, and I've been doing some online research. I might be able to get the files off the laptop myself, but I've discovered that a bloke who used to be in IT at work has started his own repair business, and his rates are not bad so I might get him to do it. Especially since I've been trying to rewire the hedge trimmer for the past two days (I trimmed through the cable last year) and haven't managed to get it working yet.

The other good thing about not having cards/cash is that I've had to taking my own dinners in to work - I'd gotten into a very bad habit of eating stodgy canteen meals every day. I'm going to keep up the home cooking too, I've been enjoying having decent healthy food every day.

Anyway, the replacement cards have all arrived. I haven't got the PINs yet so no cash, but I've managed to get groceries.

Next week I should be able to decide what to do about the laptop. I really, really loved having one and I miss it. I loved being able to take it on holiday with me, I loved writing emails in bed, I loved watching films on it, I loved lying on the sofa reading Popbitch while downloading mp3s. So I think I will either get a repair or a replacement even though I still have the desktop.

This time though, I'll do my research.

In other news, the wormery finally arrived, a fortnight after I ordered it despite a claim of "**PRIORITY DELIVERY**!". The poor wee worms were sealed in a plastic bag with a bit of compost in it, and a lot of them were dead. So I wrote and complained and they sent me some more worms, which arrived today. Sealed in a plastic bag, in an ordinary envelope. Not even a padded bag! I should report them to the RSPCA.

There isn't much worm activity so far, and they don't seem to have eaten much of the rubbish I've given them, so I've brought the bin inside. It's been in the shed, but although it's not been too cold lately a bit of quality warmth might help the worms get established. Hope they don't start creeping around the house looking for extras.

And finally: some really good news. Faye has at last sold her Milton house, hurrah. She's faxed off all the paperwork so should be debt-free very soon. She's really excited about it, as you can imagine.

:: bulbs, bulbs and more bulbs

Today I finally got out into the garden to plant the bulbs Faye gave me. Seventy (approximately) daffodil bulbs. To be honest I only planted about half of them, and so far only in the front garden. But I also hauled a big bag of soil improver out of the car boot, where it's been sitting for weeks, and spread it around, plus I did some major weeding and pruning, and planted a skimmia (another gift from Faye).

The honeysuckle is showing lots of tiny new shoots so should come away in the spring. The climbing rose doesn't look great, so fingers crossed. I'll give it a good feed later on.

If the weather forecast is wrong and it isn't too foul at the weekend I should be able to plant the rest of the bulbs out the back. Which is looking pretty terrible thanks to Bertie's latest gardening experiments. He always looks so innocent when he comes in with his back covered in dirt and his toes full of leaf-mould and roots. If the predicted gale-force winds do sweep in I'll plant the bulbs in pots.

:: jingle bells

Merry Christmas!

It's not Christmas any more, of course, it's Boxing Day ... and the year is nearly done. I got some lovely presents - thank you everyone! - and ate far too much. One of the presents was 70 daffodil bulbs (from Faye), which will need to be planted in the next few days. It's not been very frosty so far and the ground is still soft. Faye also gave me a gnome, my first ever.

I worked yesterday, not terribly hard of course, about five hours all told. I'm at work right now and will probably get home an hour earlier than normal.

I've just now bought a new TV. Eeeeek! The curse of online shopping! But it does mean I didn't have to actually battle the sales crowds at John Lewis, where the TV department is always packed, even when there isn't a sale on (it's so bad they operate a ticketing system). This way I'll have to wait for delivery, but in my book that beats waiting around to be served. I had fully intended to wait until later in the year to replace my old TV but, well, it seemed a bargain, and JL does a free five-year guarantee. The scart connection on my old set (a 15" portable) is conking out. I have to keep the plug jammed in with a pile of videos or I lose sound or get a red or green screen. This new one is a space-age 26" flat-screen marvel, yippee!

Apparently there's a direct correlation between the amount of TV you watch and the size of your backside.

But I read in the paper (ours - we are desperate for "news" at this time of year) that dogwalkers are fitter than the average gym-goer, so that's good. Running after a swan-savaging greyhound is probably equivalent to an hour on an exercise bike!

We had a great walk the other day - went to Faye's place (in Santa hat and antlers, laden with gifts) and after coffee and rum truffles we all walked along the Water of Leith to Inverleith Park, Bertie's top favourite city venue, and then back via Stockbridge. I think Bertie was impressed that Faye's flat is so close to the park. He's very nervous of her place because on his first two visits there, there were fireworks outside. He always tries to run back down the stairs, and spends most of his visit looking anxiously out the windows.

Faye was also working on Christmas Day, and says she had a great time. One of the traditions at her workplace is that the managers serve the staff with their Christmas dinner in the canteen - brilliant. She likes the atmosphere there and her co-workers, but will be looking for better paid work in the new year.

OK I had better crack on with my own work. Hope everyone had a good Christmas!

:: man in black

Yep, Bertie had a visit this morning from The Authorities. Not a police officer, thank goodness, but a nice chap from the SSPCA. Bertie cosied up to him while I made excuses for him - "completely out of character", "never done anything like this before", "normally mild-mannered".

In the end Bertie's big brown eyes worked their magic and he got off with a warning - or rather I did. Keep him on his leash.

He's been quite subdued since The Incident, so I think he realises all is not well.

:: bad dog. very, very bad dog

Today the weather has been horrible. It's been horrible all week, but today it rained all day, and it was windy too, and colder than yesterday. Being a dog owner, however, I still had to go out. The morning walk was a short one, so as a special treat, in the afternoon I took Bertie to Linlithgow, to walk round the loch. Walking past the palace I thought it looked safe to let him off the leash - no other dogs around, no children. At first he just jogged along looking happy. Then he jogged off up a little hill and did his "wild dog surveys his domain" act. I whistled and he came galloping back down to the loch.

I don't know whether it was the running or the wild dog fantasy that set him off, but he suddenly went crazy. At first it was just ducks - he not only raced at them, he chased them right into the water, getting his nice new coat all wet. I came thundering after him, yelling NO, because I could see what was in his sights now: swans. He ran at them like a creature possessed, again following them into the water. You've seen the wildlife films of cheetahs chasing wildebeest? This was the village hall reenactment. Most of the swans got away no problem, though they had to hustle. Just one youngish one was cut off from the flock. It had a crack at flying, but was too slow. Bertie caught its tail feathers and pulled it down.

Meanwhile I was in hot pursuit (hot for someone with arthritis) and shrieking like a banshee the magic words STOP and NO. They usually stop him in his tracks, but this time he'd completely lost it. He was alternately grabbing the swan and trying to get a killer hold, and evading capture by old spoilsport me. It was a very bad scene.
At last I managed to snatch hold of his coat and dragged him off the poor bird. In his struggle to get free he wriggled his head out of the chest strap, so I now had a hold of him just by the strap around his hips. That proved to be an effective deterrent, because when he struggled the strap bit into his delicate nether regions, causing extreme pain. After a lot of squealing (him) and shouting (me) he calmed down enough for me to grab his collar and get the leash clipped on. I also tightened the collar to choke-hold, because he was still in a frenzy, fighting to get free.

The swan, meanwhile, was lurching back to the water. I watched as it swam out, and it seemed ok. But Bertie's attack had been so fierce I wasn't sure whether it had been injured or not. It was hard to tell if he'd had hold of feathers or flesh.
So I called the police. I know! Dobbing in my own dog. Bit of a panic measure but I wasn't sure who else to approach. The nice officer took all my details but didn't ask much about the swan. He said he'd let the people in charge of the loch know.
The swan was heading around the loch, so I followed it for a bit, checking that it was ok. It had a couple of drinks of water and seemed to be swimming strongly and staying upright. I didn't see anyone who looked like a warden, and none of the signs had contact information. So I loaded the delinquent into the car (by now he was shaking with cold and post-adrenalin comedown) and went home.

I had a shower and went to Faye's for dinner and then to a film (Borat - hilarious), and there's been no word from the police or PETA or anyone, so fingers crossed.

If Bertie is having some sort of mid-life crisis he might have to go back to wearing the muzzle. Certainly he isn't getting off the leash if there's the least danger of him mauling any more wildlife.

In other news: the new front door is in and it's lovely. It took one man only a few hours to install and he made a beautiful job of it, everything very neat and straight. The lock action is slick and quiet - the old one would only shut after repeated slamming. Bertie was gobsmacked that our nice visitor almost immediately wrenched the front door off and carried it down the path. Maybe that had something to do with today's outburst - he lost face by hiding in his bed after the door was stolen instead of confronting the robber, so he tried to kill us something nice for tea.

:: fiat lux

The kitchen ceiling's been needing attention for a while. First of all there was the light, an ancient fluorescent thing, one of the ones that does nothing for a little while after you throw the switch, then flickers and stutters as if sighing irritably before flooding the room with harsh light. One day the bulb, all three feet of it, slipped out and crashed to the floor in a squillion tiny sharp shards. I got a new bulb and secured the loose end with gaffer tape (though Faye showed me how you could just tap the end smartly with a fish slice to knock it back in).

Then one day I came home and found a big puddle of water on the kitchen floor. It was coming from the bathroom. Specifically, the tiles around the bath were only held on by mould, and every time I showered the water seeped between the tiles and the wall and thus into the kitchen. So I tore off all the tiles, let the wall dry thoroughly and retiled and grouted and sealed. Down in the kitchen the skim on the ceiling dried, split and curled.

It became more and more apparent that Something Had to be Done.

So finally, a few weeks ago now, I climbed up and ladder, measured the old light and bought a new fitting, a shiny white fluorescent one (hey! they're low-energy!) with a diffuser. I brought it home, held it up under the old one and voila! It was about a foot too long. Tsk. So I went back to the DIY shop but they didn't have a smaller one with a diffuser. I got a refund and went to another DIY shop that did. By this time it was too late to actually fit the thing, so I left it until the following weekend.

Which is when I took down the old fitting (having of course first taken out the fuse for the lighting circuit). I then held the new fitting up to the ceiling and realised it was a foot smaller. Curse! Damn! I'd been the victim of an optical illusion when I'd held the original new one up! Ach.

And then I got rocks in my ears (see previous post), which stopped me from climbing ladders.

There followed a week of squalor, with a ladder and a standard lamp filling up most of the kitchen. I scraped off all the peeling plaster, gave it a cursory rubdown, then realised I'd have to wash the ceiling with sugar soap before painting. Sigh. It's a filthy job, but worth the effort. After a few days drying I moved out all my stuff and carpeted the worktops, floor etc in newspaper and painted the ceiling. Another grim job.

Finally I spent a couple of hours teetering on the ladder and fiddling with insanely tiny screws (lost count of the number of times I dropped them) before realising I'd need to fill the gaping hole previously covered by the old, clunky light fitting. More cursing and swearing and leaving-overnight-to-dry.

At long last, the new fixture was bolted into place, the bulb inserted, the diffuser slipped on - and TA DA! It worked. It's a bluer light than the old one, which although harsh was mellowed towards the warm side of the spectrum by a baked-on layer of grease and dead flies. The best thing is that the new one comes on instantly, soon as you hit the switch.

Next on the agenda: a new door. It goes in next Wednesday. I'm taking the day off, I'm so excited.

Energised by all the DIY success I climbed up into the loft yesterday. I have a vague idea of improving the insulation up there and boarding part of the floor. Plus there is junk up there dating from the previous owner. It's hellish though: the current insulation is part fibreglass batts, part - I don't know, some kind of vile crumbly fluff. I need to do something about protecting the water tanks - they have some half-hearted lagging, but I'll have to fix it on better, or get something new.

I tidied Faye's stuff into a corner and hauled Mrs Blackett's old heaters over to the hatch. The electric one was easy enough to deal with - I just lowered it down by its flex. The gas one was heavier and had no flex. I tried wrestling it down, but decided halfway down the ladder, with the heater balanced on my chest, that it wasn't exactly safe and shoved it back up. I'll have to get some rope. I noticed in passing that its ceramic elements are healthier looking than my current gas heater's, so I may do a transplant.

After doing a lot of research I've concluded that I do probably need some more insulation up there - I can't remember the exact figures, but the depth you're supposed to have is deeper than my joists, so I'd have to extend the height of the joists or risk plunging through the ceiling every time I went up there. An alternative would be insulating the roof, but then there's a lot of faff about condensation and ventilation. So I'm plunking for ... the status quo. Some insulation is better than none, surely? And I'll just screw down some duck boards for ease of access.

The next big project on the horizon is central heating. Mine is ancient and inefficient, it desperately needs replacing with a more modern system. But which one? And how much will it cost? And which is the greenest option? Some green opinion seems to be turning against micro-generation - mini wind turbines, solar panels etc - as consuming too many resources in their manufacture. Electricity is more efficient to use than gas but is polluting to create. So I don't know. I might make up my mind and go for it next year, if I still have a job.

No progress in the garden as yet - but lots of planning!! I have just about decided where to plant the plum tree, if I ever get round to buying one. And the raised bed in completed in my head too.

In between projects I've been busy with work and long walks and a bit of socialising. Bertie is well and happy. He turned nine last month, hard to believe he's nearly into double figures. He isn't as scatty as he used to be but can still put on a show of speed when he feels like it.

Faye's doing well - she's enjoying her job still and loving living in Edinburgh.

:: weakly report

I don't know where this week has gone - or this month, come to that. Last week everything was going swimmingly - a nice man came and cleaned and painted my gutters and downpipes; another nice man came and measured up for a new front door; I managed to get a nice new light fitting for the kitchen (only took three DIY shop visits to get the right one! amazing). Then the wheels started coming off. Not literally, of course. Just stupid little things one after another.

The phone stopped working. I kind of noticed but didn't do anything about it due to coming down with a mysterious attack of vertigo. It started with just a little dizzy spell last Saturday morning. But on Sunday it started before I even got out of bed and continued all day - with added nausea. Monday it was slightly better so I called the doctor - 1st available appointment was Thursday. In the meantime I did some internet research and decided it was Benign Paroxysmal Positional Vertigo, or "rocks in the ears". I did some of the exercises recommended and they seemed to help. But then Tuesday I felt nauseous again, and too dizzy to feel safe driving, so called in sick. Was OK again the next day, though still a bit giddy.

About this time I thought I'd better talk to the door people, and it turned out they'd been trying and trying to get hold of me. "I was about to compose a letter to you," the man said. Cor, must be serious! The date for the new door installation is now set for 13 December, hurrah. It has just started getting cold enough for the old one to warp and stick, which it does every winter.

So I ordered a new phone, after putting in new batteries didn't work (the broadband access was still working, so I was convinced it must be the equipment). And then I saw the doctor, who diagnosed Benign Positional Vertigo (I didn't tell him I knew that, or correct him on the name) and gave me some wonderful anti-nausea pills. And a printout of exercises! He Googled them right in front of me! Ha ha ha. I'm going to open my own health clinic, where people describe their symptoms and I Google them.

After that I thought I may as well report a phone fault, just in case. BT turned on a stunning display of efficiency! I was able to divert any incoming calls to my mobile and request text updates of progress. Sure enough, an enginner was on the case within hours and soon discovered a fault on the line. He called today and said it was actually a problem at the exchange and he's fixed it. By this time my new phone had arrived, and it's miles better than my old one - it has nice big clear buttons for a start.

Meanwhile I've been having nice walks every day - Bertie's in fine fettle and enjoying the chilly weather. It's been raining most days; last Friday was especially miserable, with strong winds, and there were mostly just us dog-walkers out there slogging around while our hounds had a fabby time. Today was great - a skiff of snow on the hills but fresh and still and clear. This morning we went round the marina with Lisa from up the road with her chow Eli and sharpei UB (ugly bugger) and then in the afternoon up to Linn Mill, where we met a nice friendly collie and his owner.

Later on though I looked out the window and it was pelting with rain again - which is why on a Saturday night I'm slumped on the sofa in my jogging bottoms and sheepskin slippers (thanks to Jean and Margie, soooo cosy!!) blogging about my new phone.

Bliss.

:: the autumn edition

The clocks went back on Sunday and suddenly we're on the slippery slope to winter. Slippery as in rain on fallen leaves, thick mud and puddles. Not slippery as in ice - not yet anyway.

At the moment my obsession is mostly house-related. So much to do and so little interest from workmen in doing it! I'm trying simultaneously to get a new front door (on my to-do list for several years now) and a lick of paint on the gutterings and downpipes. A local chap is supposed to be giving me a quote for a door and the man who made a lovely job of next door's guttering is meant to be doing mine too. No sign of life from either.

In the meantime, ever optimistic, I attacked the honeysuckle and the climbing rose at the front with the wonderful loppers Faye gave me. I meant to just clear them away from the downpipes, but went a bit mad and cut the whole lot down. Ooops! Faye assures me they'll probably grow back. I hope so. It looks very bald out there.

Other plans, DIY this time, include replacing the strip light in the kitchen (held together by gaffer tape at the moment) and fixing up the peeling patch in the ceiling that dates from the time the bathroom leaked.

Then there's the garden. I have great plans for the garden. At the moment it's a jungle - I missed a couple of crucial lawn-mowing opportunities and it's been raining since, so the grass is a foot long or more front and back. I want to put in some raised beds, mainly to keep them out of Bertie's reach, and I want some fruit trees, a plum tree at least and maybe an apple as well. I don't think there's room for everything. Out the front, I'm savaging the rose bush as well as the climbers. It looks like two rose bushes, but I think what happened was that the rootstock on the original got out of control, so there's an ailing hybrid nearly choked out by a vigorous rosa. I'm cutting out all the rootstock suckers and pruning the hybrid back. I'll feed it in the spring and see how it goes. It's quite a pretty one, deep pink. I'm also planting more lavender - it does well and of course smells wonderful. The funny sickly little daphne bush has put on a growth spurt so I'll leave it even though it still hasn't flowered.

Out in the wider world it's been an amazing few weeks for fungi-spotting. I've never ever seen such a variety. The beginning of the month was warm and wet so conditions were perfect, but I wonder where the fungi were last year. Does the spawn lie dormant until conditions are right? Is it blown in from elsewhere? I've been taking loads of photos of them, they're fascinating.

I've been doing a lot of walking and enjoying it. Yesterday Faye and I went on a long ramble around Holyrood Park, which was just great. It was a blustery day but not wet or cold (yes, I should really have been mowing the lawn). Bertie had a fabulous time too. We had a look at the Parliament too, and then had dinner at Faye's place. She's settling in well, has her flat looking lovely and will be getting the phone on any minute now - she has her mobile but is missing being able to keep up with emails.

:: more pix

"During" shots rather than "after" ones - Faye's still still living in a sea of boxes.

In the kitchen. This was taken last Sunday - I had dinner at Faye's (roast lamb) and then we went to the Fireworks Concert.

One of the livingroom windows.

The table, with the radio I gave Faye as an early birthday present. It's a digital one, gets about 35 stations.

The building the flat is in.

And from the other side.

The other side of the street - there are some really cute little corners in these quiet back streets.

Looking out towards Dublin Street.

:: what I did on my holidays

Travelogue later ... I'm going to start with the more recent stuff, ie Faye's big move. I collected the keys to her new flat on Friday, because she was working, and when she got home we hopped in the car and rushed straight over there. Here are the photos (click on them for a larger version; if you want to save them, right-click and choose "save as"):


Bertie came along for the ride. We are such IKEA experts we immediately identified the chair as a Poang.


Faye admires her *lovely* pine headboard.



There's a built-in wardrobe too.


Bertie was a bit nervous in case the owners came home and caught us there.


The livingroom has another window similar to these ones, nice traditional style with brass latches and clanking weights. It's all very airy and light.


The kitchen is small but packs in a lot of kit - fridge, freezer, washing machine and stove. There's a microwave too.


The sofa is from IKEA as well.


Whoops, this one came out a bit dark


Among the furniture was this odd little chair.


Faye looooooooves her tiny little chair


See? It's made for little people.

Saturday was the big day though. Faye got up early and loaded her car, then after breakfast and Bertie's walk we took both cars to the storage depot for more stuff. Traffic was terrible but that was the only hitch - the flat is in a little mews (though spelled "meuse" in this case") courtyard, so we could just park and unload with ease. We had a cup of coffee (the flat has everything, right down to cups and a kettle) and a little rest, then went back to the storage place for a few more things. Then back to my place for tea (takeaways) and another walk for Bertie before Faye headed back to her flat.

Her biggest challenge will be fitting all her things in. She's going to keep her storage unit on for a while until she gets organised. Otherwise the flat is perfect. The location is amazing - right in town but very quiet. The only noise we heard on Friday night was a burst of fireworks from the Tattoo. There's a pub nearby but it's not a noisy one. As a housewarming gift I gave her an early birthday present - a digital radio. So while she doesn't have a TV she does have 35 radio stations to keep her entertained!

Meanwhile I'm enjoying having my house to myself again - sharing it for such a long time underlined for me that I really am a hermit, I love living on my own. It's bliss!

:: heat

The heatwave has cooled down a little, so I'll crank out an update. As most of my readers (all three of you) will know, Faye has migrated north from Englandshire and is at present a houseguest in Salty Towers. She started work today, in a care home on the outskirts of the city. The agency she'd been intending to work for were disorganised and ditzy about her interview and the paperwork and the feeling was they'd probably be disorganised about pay too, so she had a look for other work and landed the care-home job right away. She said it had a friendly, cheerful atmosphere.

Faye has also landed a flat, a nice one-bedroomed furnished place in a lovely quiet cobbled mews courtyard just down the road from the National Portrait Gallery. It isn't available until the end of August. She's looking forward to living in the middle of town and I'm sure she'll be happy there - she certainly won't be short of entertainment.

In the meantime, we've been enjoying some scorching weather - though not absolutely everyone has been enjoying it.



Poor Bertie has been suffering. He loves going for walks, but now has to stick to shady places and trudges panting from watering hole to watering hole. I sometimes take water with me, but he'll only tolerate a "plasticky" drink if he's desperate. The best walks are at night, when it's usually a bit cooler - even the evening's too warm for him. Or in places where there's a nice cooling stream to paddle in (there's one among the trees in the photo). One day I hosed him down after his walk, and he enjoyed that.

The garden's a bit dry, but the soft fruit has done quite well, the blackcurrants in particular. I made some jam at the weekend - even though it was really too hot to be messing with boiling and sterilising!

I've got two weeks' holiday this month, hurrah. I'm going up north for a bit - Andrew is back up there for a year and I'm going to visit him before he starts teaching. He's finished his year of training in Glasgow and will be in his probationary posting at a school near the farm. I'm going to a couple of shows at the Festival and will no doubt see some Fringe things too, and then I might head for the hills for a few days. Faye is due to move into her flat on the last day of my hol, so I'll be able to help with that. She has most of her stuff in storage, but ... well, you know Faye. She has a few tonnes of kit at my place as well.

I was thinking of going up to Torridon, in the north-west. I like the look of this place, though I'm slightly put off by the line "Where Eagles Fly Free" appearing above "dogs are welcome" and a photo of a nervous-looking dachshund. They accept "UK based dogs with well-behaved owners" - presumably owners who won't get hysterical when an eagle makes off with Fido. I also fancy the Old Mill Highland Lodge, which says: "No television. No loud music! No smoking. No children. Well behaved dogs accepted." And ye'll have had yer tea...

I've idled away a few hours recently redecorating my website. Same crappy old content, but spiffy new design.

:: update

Procrastination is a pain. I'm forever putting things off and getting myself in a hideous fankle trying to catch up - or losing out altogether. Yesterday was a prime example: I'd finally sat down with my date book and the sailing school brochure and worked out which canoeing course was doable. Then yesterday I finally remembered to take my bank card with me when walking Bertie down to the marina. And guess what? The canoeing courses are really popular and are all booked out apart from a couple in September and October.

So I went home and checked the dates on those courses and guess what? I can't do any of them. Damn! I'm so cross with myself! If I'd only been sensible and booked the day I looked at canoes. Gah. I've put my name down for cancellations and have made a mental note to book early next year.

Anyway. This past week has been blissful. I've been on holiday, and I've had what I can only describe as ... a holiday. I didn't go anywhere or do anything much. It's been unbelievably enjoyable and restful and restorative. The weather was mostly hot and sunny, perfect for sitting outdoors with my tapestry or a book or (occasionally) a trowel and fork.

The main reason for such blissful inactivity was that Bertie had a mystery sore leg and was confined to tiny short walks and plenty of bed rest. I still don't know what was wrong with him - possibly a sprain. At first it was so painful he couldn't put any weight on it at all. The vet wanted to X-ray it but that means a general anaesthetic, which really knocks him around so I opted to wait and see. And he's all better! So this week, which I also have off, I'll probably head north for a few days.

The main excitements of the past month or so have been family-related. Margie, Jean and Jean's son's partner Rachel stopped off on their grand tour, and the week or so before that Faye was up for a few days. It was simplest for me to move out of my room into "Bertie's room" for a few weeks and "de-Bertie" the other rooms. And what a frenzy of cleaning I went into! Ha ha ha! The header-tank leak came back to haunt me, as the drying-out of the wall and door-jamb in the upstairs hall meant the paint cracked and flaked off. I had to scrape off the old paint, prime the bare plaster and wood thus revealed and repaint. Faye was a trouper and got busy in the garden.

So anyway the house and garden were relatively (ha ha!) clean and tidy for the cousinly visit and they had a good time. I took a day off work and we went across to Dunfermline and looked at the ancestral home, Bamboo Cottage. That was funny, actually. Margie was brave and knocked at the door. The woman who answered went a bit tight-lipped when Margie explained who we were and said: "Yes, this has happened before." She said we could take photos of the front of the house but we couldn't go round the back "because I've got children in the house". Errr ... OK, thanks.

After that we went on a wild-goose chase, looking for Luscar House. In the end, a local woman told us it had been pulled down three years ago. I did some net research later, and it seems that the owner was in hot water for demolishing it without getting permission - it was a listed building. We also had a look round the nearest graveyard, at Carnock, but didn't find any family there. After all that ancestral stuff we did some sightseeing around the East Neuk of Fife before heading back to take poor Bertie for a hobble round the park. We had dinner at my favourite local eaterie, Orocco Pier.

The three of them did a lot of sightseeing around Edinburgh, the highlight being the Castle. They headed off up north for a whirl around various castles and such, before heading back down to London via York and the Lakes District. They had a gorgeous day for the Trooping of the Colour yesterday, I'm sure they enjoyed that.

The weather may be hot down south, but it's cooled down a little here, with some welcome rain. I did some solid work in the garden yesterday and mowed the lawns too, so it's all looking quite spiffy. The poppies are having a bumper year - the blooms are like dinner plates! And it looks as though there's going to be a good harvest of soft fruit.

Right now I'm going to take Bertie for a nice long walk somewhere and drop off some recycling stuff. Moving rooms spurred me into yet another de-clutter: I have too much junk! It must go!

:: dumb and dumberer

I've had such a clunker of a day... first of all I locked myself out of the house. Again. I realised it as soon as I shut the door. I was on my way into town to collect my new digi-TV-DVD-recorder combo thingie (my old DVD player won't play a whole disc without overheating and stopping & the old digi-TV receiver is stuck on Channel 5, which is mainly CIS and plastic surgery) and taking Bertie along for a walk. Not a tragedy though, because I've left a set with next door because I'm always locking myself out.

The next dumberer moment was en route to work. I started to feel very chilly, which was odd given that it's a hot, muggy day. Then I realised it was because I'd put the air conditioning on. I hardly ever use it but it's a hot, muggy day ... Duh.

And then at work I tried to negotiate the heavy canteen doors while carrying several cups of coffee on a tray AND wearing a white shirt. I'll leave the rest to your imagination.

I haven't had much time with the DVD recorder because of all the tutuing around getting the spare keys etc, but it seems to be insanely complicated and wonderful. I got it from Argos, the cheap and cheerful warehouse place, and it was a bargain. I think I'll be able to copy my videos on to DVDs, and then I'll just have one box instead of a guddle of wires and remotes. The image quality is heaps better too. Still the same old telly though, which seems to just keep on keeping on.

The Cow Parade is here! Lots of amazing designs, though sadly some have been vandalised and one - Fruit Smooothy - has even vanished entirely.

There are a few outside work, this one's my favourite:



Over the Moo-n

More cow puns than you can shake a stick at.

:: splashing out

It's a couple of years since I did any sailing and I really miss it. So I've been casting around for a water-based activity that won't be too hard on my poor old knees. I've long had a hankering to try scuba diving, but in the end the complexity of equipment, not to mention all the folderol of getting out to divable depths etc etc, is offputting. I'd probably end up only doing it on holidays, when what I really want is something I can do for a couple of hours on a whim.

So the latest thing I'm looking at is canoing or kayaking. I had a good talk to a chap in the Bosun's Locker shop at the marina and am just about ready to buy something. But it's so hard to decide! The cheapest option is a sit-on plastic kayak, but you wouldn't be able to do longer excursions on that; it's really just a fine-day fun thing. The next size of sit-on would be better. Then there are the kayaks and sea kayaks, which are more expensive but have more storage space and are good for longer trips.

My idea would be to keep the boat in the shed and trundle it to the slipway (you can get a lovely little set of wheels) when I fancied a spin. Eventually I could get a roofrack for the car and take it on holiday. I'd start out just doing a couple of hours pottering up and down the river close to home, but I'd like to work up to proper excursions, up to Blackness for example.

But obviously I would like to test-drive a kayak before shelling out £350+ for all the kit. The chandlers offers a quick turn around the bit of harbour immediately by the shop, but I want more like half a day to be sure it's for me. Today I talked to Iain about it - he's one of the instructors at the sailing school. He said I may be able to hire a kayak from them, but I'd have to talk to Ollie, the head of the sailing school. Happily I bumped into him a bit later; he wasn't as enthusiastic as Iain though (to be fair, it's hard to imagine anyone as enthusiastic as Iain - he's a one-off!). He cited safety rules etc etc, said they don't normally hire kayaks to individuals. He suggested taking a course. So I picked up a brochure and they have a weekend course for beginners, and a weekend sea kayaking course. That's the one for me, I reckon: "paddling, self-rescue, navigation and passage planning". You need "3 or 4 days' minimum experience", which I have - albeit from nearly 20 years ago; I did a week-long trip down the Wanganui back in the late 80s. I may do both courses, just to be sure.


This is the Necky Sky, which is a small "recreational" kayak. I like the look of it, though it wouldn't be suitable for longer trips. It doesn't have any storage space, just the bungee cords. You can fit a hatch, but it's a faff. The ones that are for longer trips are bigger, heavier and more expensive.



This is the cheapest option, an Ocean Kayak Frenzy - it's purely a fun boat. If I decide against kayaking long-distance, this would be nice for just the occasional splash around in a loch or river on a nice day.

The Bosuns Locker also sells inflatable kayaks, but I'd be too nervous of springing a leak to go far in one of those! Though the salesman said they are very sturdy and surprisingly good to paddle.

In other news: apparently our jobs are safe for at least a year. We had been very nervous as the axe swung in other departments - something our new owners call "synergy". But we have been assured there will be no cuts in our numbers.

Meanwhile I'm looking forward to hosting Margie, Jean and Rachel during their OE. They are in Spain at the moment and get here at the beginning of June. Hurrah!

Faye is still looking for work up here - she has an interview for one in Edinburgh that offers just a couple of days a week, which would be a start.

I'd better get ready for work!

:: spring update

Ummmmmm.... As usual, I haven't been doing much.

The garden is a wreck, mainly due to the weather. But then this weekend (Easter) the weather hasn't been too bad and the garden is still a wreck. An attack of laziness, I'm afraid. I did tidy up out the back a bit, as it's almost nice enough out to breakfast outdoors, hurrah. And I potted up some lilies given to me by a friend I did some IT work for. The garlic has been trompled on a bit by a certain dog but is coming up nicely despite that.

The house is also a wreck, though not as much a wreck as next door - Frances has discovered an unexplained seepage above her front door, causing the wall to crumble away. Someone has checked out the plumbing and it seems ok, so now she's looking at the weeds growing out of the guttering and thinking maybe it's that. Mysterious that she's got no damp upstairs though. Touch wood, my place is at least structurally sound. Last year's leak from the header tank in the loft cracked the plaster skim on the wall in the hallway as it dried, but I can live with that. (And no, Frances' mystery damp isn't related to my leak - it's in a different spot altogether.)

Faye came to visit for a couple of days last week - she drove up overnight, having finished work at about 6pm on the Sunday, but got lost on the way up and ended up driving south again for an hour before realising her mistake. So she wisely stopped off at a hotel and continued in the morning. She's still looking for a job up here, no luck so far.

I've been on some lovely walks, got hailed on (Bertie is most baffled by hail - hey, who's throwing stones at us? stop it, it hurts!) and rained on, and on one glorious day slipped in fresh mud (while wiping away tears after being whipped in the face by a branch let slip by my neighbour, who was squelching up the path ahead of me) and actually slid a little ways downhill on my belly. My poor neighbour was mortified, but it was funny - I was giggling as I slid.

Another neighbour has a new puppy - a shar pei. I had to visit to meet it, because it's only just had its vaccination shots and isn't allowed out on the street. It's the cutest, sweetest pup, really adorable. She already has a chow chow and previously had akitas - she's keen on oriental breeds.

Speaking of unusual pets, I met a man taking his cat for a walk the other day! Luckily Bertie didn't spot it, so he had time to pick the cat up and I had time to get Bertie on the leash. The cat was very relaxed, but did give a warning growl when Bertie looked at it. He looked away again smartish - no way was he starting a fight! The man said the cat has already beaten up a doberman. Later on I spotted it sitting on the parcel shelf of his 4x4, a great big tabby with yellow eyes.

Bertie's in fine form - he's not had any accidents for a while now (touch wood). I did find a lump that worried me for a bit, but it's not gotten any bigger so the vet says it's probably ok. He certainly looks healthy, with a lovely sleek coat and the coldest, wettest nose around.

Work is fine - the new owners have been sacking people left and right but not in our department. Yet. I've never felt particularly secure, so after ten years on staff I'm used to worrying about being sacked!

:: at auction

A while back I visited the website of an auction firm in Falkirk and signed up to get the catalogue for its weekly sales by email. So now I get this lovely weekly dip into People's Stuff. The regular sale is Wednesday evenings, so because I work nights I never get to go. But one of these weeks I'm going to take a Wednesday off specifically so I can.

This week's catalogue is a real gem. There's the usual torrent of "Misc Including Carlton etc" and "China Table Lamp", and "sign of the times" lots - "2 Radiograms £20-£30" and "Sel of Records & Videos £8-£12" (and I really want to know the difference between "Box of Misc" and "Box of Odds"). There are also comical mysteries: "Coq Au Van. £6-£10", "Enamel Bread Bin & Contents £10-£15", "Lark Yukelleli. £10-£15".

But a weird dissonance gathers as you read through. For example:

287 Moorland Fish Vase. £ 20.00 — £ 30.00
288 Murano Glass Vase. £ 25.00 — £ 40.00
289 Lorna Bailey Startled Cat. £ 20.00 — £ 30.00
290 Selection of Coronation Street Stars Autographs. £ 30.00 — £ 50.00
291 Nazi Cup Saucer & Spoon. £ 15.00 — £ 20.00
292 Bretby Honey Box & Cover. £ 15.00 — £ 30.00
293 2 Golf Club Heads. £ 10.00 — £ 20.00

Woah! Nazi cup saucer and spoon? There's Nazi stuff sprinkled throughout the catalogue, mostly medals and badges. I googled Lorna Bailey and found she designs the most vile, garish ceramics imaginable. I started to get a woozy vision of a Colonel Bufferish character ("Masonic Apron Sash Jewel etc. £25-£40")surrounded by stamp albums, military paraphenalia and golfing kit. His wife channels her repressed rage into a vast collection of china cats, dogs, rabbits, birds and pigs. Their house is crammed with furniture - "6 Tier Open Bookcase" and "Mahogany Corner Cabinet".

I like to think he's the one who popped his clogs and she's moving to the south of France with the proceeds from the sale.

:: back by popular demand

OK, it was just Mog. But hey, at least I have A Reader.

Um, so, what have I been doing? My knees have been pretty good lately so I've been going on longer walks - on Sunday, for example, I went to the Pentlands and ended up hiking for about three or four hours.



That's Carnethy Hill from Turnhouse Hill. In the olden days I would have kept on going over Carnethy and down the Old Kirk Road and walked back past the two reservoirs. But this time I felt a bit too knackered, so I cut straight down the hill. It looked easy from the top, ha ha! But it was incredibly steep and boggy too, so it was actually quite arduous. Plus because it's sheep country Bertie has to be on the lead. By this stage he was getting frustrated - "Come on, it's downhill! Shake a leg!" - and kept tugging on the lead. In the end I let him off, and he went crazy, zinging back and forth through the heather looking for the sheep. Luckily I managed to get him back on the lead before we got to them (they were at the bottom of the hill near the burn).



There was still a bit of snow around but it was pretty slushy. There's been a lot of snow around this winter (you can't really call it spring yet!) but very little in my neck of the woods. There was one decent fall at the beginning of this month but it only lasted a couple of days. There was another fall last week - see above for the remnants - but it lasted even less than that. And yesterday it snowed again but didn't lie.



Bertie loved the big snowfall - all the dogs did.

In between breaks in the weather I managed to plant some garlic, but haven't done any other gardening. One of the lavender bushes out the front has died - I guess I should have protected it from the frost. Everything else looks ok though. Hungry rabbits have kept the back lawn neatly trimmed. There are healthy buds on all the fruit bushes.

I realise from looking back that I haven't finished telling about the redecorating. It's a typical tale. Dumb move number one was getting the double bed before painting the small bedroom - that meant there was nowhere to put the furniture. Duh. Cue a week of edging around piles of stuff. Anyhoo, once I had the room stripped I started right in with the left-over paint from my own bedroom, a nice blue. Just to see how that would look, you know. And it did look ok, but after a wall and a half it became apparent that I didn't have nearly enough paint. The finish on the existing paint was a strange semi-gloss and the blue went on very unevenly. It was a B&Q own brand, so off I went for some more. Why I thought they would have any I don't know. They didn't. And I couldn't be bothered driving to the other branches to see if they had any, so I spent another hour dithering over colour chips and samples before choosing something called Cafe Au Lait or Caramel or Light Mud or something. You get the picture. Dull.

Home again I got busy with the roller. Next day I was back at B&Q for another bucket. Paint paint paint. Every time I thought I was finished I'd see another patchy patch. It was gruesome. And such a horrible colour! What was I thinking? Why not a nice fresh yellow? I threw everything back in, made the bed, put up the curtains and it still looked horrible. But I can't be bothered to do it again so it'll just have to stay like that.

The only other DIY I've done since then is to put doors on one of my bookshelves in the dining room, thus creating a cupboard for liquor and teatowels. How posh am I!

The city council is doing some redecorating though - they're fixing up the Ferry Glen walk. The glen is a beautiful little chunk of steeply-sloping woodland with a stream plunging down at one end. It did have a path through it but it's been neglected over the years and has mostly been washed away. For the past couple of weeks the sound of chainsaws has been loud as workmen clear out dead and sickly trees, chip them and spread the chips as mulch. They've had heavy machinery in too, widening the path and laying gravel and hard core. It's nearly finished.



There are still some trees waiting to be cut down. I'm going to miss some of them!