28 August 2006

:: what I did on my holidays

Travelogue later ... I'm going to start with the more recent stuff, ie Faye's big move. I collected the keys to her new flat on Friday, because she was working, and when she got home we hopped in the car and rushed straight over there. Here are the photos (click on them for a larger version; if you want to save them, right-click and choose "save as"):

Faye and Bertie
Bertie came along for the ride. We are such IKEA experts we immediately identified the chair as a Poang.

the bedroom
Faye admires her *lovely* pine headboard.


the bedroom
There's a built-in wardrobe too.

bertie
Bertie was a bit nervous in case the owners came home and caught us there.

the dining table
The livingroom has another window similar to these ones, nice traditional style with brass latches and clanking weights. It's all very airy and light.

the kitchen
The kitchen is small but packs in a lot of kit - fridge, freezer, washing machine and stove. There's a microwave too.

livingroom
The sofa is from IKEA as well.

livingroom
Whoops, this one came out a bit dark

wee chair
Among the furniture was this odd little chair.

wee chair
Faye looooooooves her tiny little chair

wee chair
See? It's made for little people.

Saturday was the big day though. Faye got up early and loaded her car, then after breakfast and Bertie's walk we took both cars to the storage depot for more stuff. Traffic was terrible but that was the only hitch - the flat is in a little mews (though spelled "meuse" in this case") courtyard, so we could just park and unload with ease. We had a cup of coffee (the flat has everything, right down to cups and a kettle) and a little rest, then went back to the storage place for a few more things. Then back to my place for tea (takeaways) and another walk for Bertie before Faye headed back to her flat.

Her biggest challenge will be fitting all her things in. She's going to keep her storage unit on for a while until she gets organised. Otherwise the flat is perfect. The location is amazing - right in town but very quiet. The only noise we heard on Friday night was a burst of fireworks from the Tattoo. There's a pub nearby but it's not a noisy one. As a housewarming gift I gave her an early birthday present - a digital radio. So while she doesn't have a TV she does have 35 radio stations to keep her entertained!

Meanwhile I'm enjoying having my house to myself again - sharing it for such a long time underlined for me that I really am a hermit, I love living on my own. It's bliss!

1 August 2006

:: heat

The heatwave has cooled down a little, so I'll crank out an update. As most of my readers (all three of you) will know, Faye has migrated north from Englandshire and is at present a houseguest in Salty Towers. She started work today, in a care home on the outskirts of the city. The agency she'd been intending to work for were disorganised and ditzy about her interview and the paperwork and the feeling was they'd probably be disorganised about pay too, so she had a look for other work and landed the care-home job right away. She said it had a friendly, cheerful atmosphere.

Faye has also landed a flat, a nice one-bedroomed furnished place in a lovely quiet cobbled mews courtyard just down the road from the National Portrait Gallery. It isn't available until the end of August. She's looking forward to living in the middle of town and I'm sure she'll be happy there - she certainly won't be short of entertainment.

In the meantime, we've been enjoying some scorching weather - though not absolutely everyone has been enjoying it.

too damned hot

Poor Bertie has been suffering. He loves going for walks, but now has to stick to shady places and trudges panting from watering hole to watering hole. I sometimes take water with me, but he'll only tolerate a "plasticky" drink if he's desperate. The best walks are at night, when it's usually a bit cooler - even the evening's too warm for him. Or in places where there's a nice cooling stream to paddle in (there's one among the trees in the photo). One day I hosed him down after his walk, and he enjoyed that.

The garden's a bit dry, but the soft fruit has done quite well, the blackcurrants in particular. I made some jam at the weekend - even though it was really too hot to be messing with boiling and sterilising!

I've got two weeks' holiday this month, hurrah. I'm going up north for a bit - Andrew is back up there for a year and I'm going to visit him before he starts teaching. He's finished his year of training in Glasgow and will be in his probationary posting at a school near the farm. I'm going to a couple of shows at the Festival and will no doubt see some Fringe things too, and then I might head for the hills for a few days. Faye is due to move into her flat on the last day of my hol, so I'll be able to help with that. She has most of her stuff in storage, but ... well, you know Faye. She has a few tonnes of kit at my place as well.

I was thinking of going up to Torridon, in the north-west. I like the look of this place, though I'm slightly put off by the line "Where Eagles Fly Free" appearing above "dogs are welcome" and a photo of a nervous-looking dachshund. They accept "UK based dogs with well-behaved owners" - presumably owners who won't get hysterical when an eagle makes off with Fido. I also fancy the Old Mill Highland Lodge, which says: "No television. No loud music! No smoking. No children. Well behaved dogs accepted." And ye'll have had yer tea...

I've idled away a few hours recently redecorating my website. Same crappy old content, but spiffy new design.

18 June 2006

:: update

Procrastination is a pain. I'm forever putting things off and getting myself in a hideous fankle trying to catch up - or losing out altogether. Yesterday was a prime example: I'd finally sat down with my date book and the sailing school brochure and worked out which canoeing course was doable. Then yesterday I finally remembered to take my bank card with me when walking Bertie down to the marina. And guess what? The canoeing courses are really popular and are all booked out apart from a couple in September and October.

So I went home and checked the dates on those courses and guess what? I can't do any of them. Damn! I'm so cross with myself! If I'd only been sensible and booked the day I looked at canoes. Gah. I've put my name down for cancellations and have made a mental note to book early next year.

Anyway. This past week has been blissful. I've been on holiday, and I've had what I can only describe as ... a holiday. I didn't go anywhere or do anything much. It's been unbelievably enjoyable and restful and restorative. The weather was mostly hot and sunny, perfect for sitting outdoors with my tapestry or a book or (occasionally) a trowel and fork.

The main reason for such blissful inactivity was that Bertie had a mystery sore leg and was confined to tiny short walks and plenty of bed rest. I still don't know what was wrong with him - possibly a sprain. At first it was so painful he couldn't put any weight on it at all. The vet wanted to X-ray it but that means a general anaesthetic, which really knocks him around so I opted to wait and see. And he's all better! So this week, which I also have off, I'll probably head north for a few days.

The main excitements of the past month or so have been family-related. Margie, Jean and Jean's son's partner Rachel stopped off on their grand tour, and the week or so before that Faye was up for a few days. It was simplest for me to move out of my room into "Bertie's room" for a few weeks and "de-Bertie" the other rooms. And what a frenzy of cleaning I went into! Ha ha ha! The header-tank leak came back to haunt me, as the drying-out of the wall and door-jamb in the upstairs hall meant the paint cracked and flaked off. I had to scrape off the old paint, prime the bare plaster and wood thus revealed and repaint. Faye was a trouper and got busy in the garden.

So anyway the house and garden were relatively (ha ha!) clean and tidy for the cousinly visit and they had a good time. I took a day off work and we went across to Dunfermline and looked at the ancestral home, Bamboo Cottage. That was funny, actually. Margie was brave and knocked at the door. The woman who answered went a bit tight-lipped when Margie explained who we were and said: "Yes, this has happened before." She said we could take photos of the front of the house but we couldn't go round the back "because I've got children in the house". Errr ... OK, thanks.

After that we went on a wild-goose chase, looking for Luscar House. In the end, a local woman told us it had been pulled down three years ago. I did some net research later, and it seems that the owner was in hot water for demolishing it without getting permission - it was a listed building. We also had a look round the nearest graveyard, at Carnock, but didn't find any family there. After all that ancestral stuff we did some sightseeing around the East Neuk of Fife before heading back to take poor Bertie for a hobble round the park. We had dinner at my favourite local eaterie, Orocco Pier.

The three of them did a lot of sightseeing around Edinburgh, the highlight being the Castle. They headed off up north for a whirl around various castles and such, before heading back down to London via York and the Lakes District. They had a gorgeous day for the Trooping of the Colour yesterday, I'm sure they enjoyed that.

The weather may be hot down south, but it's cooled down a little here, with some welcome rain. I did some solid work in the garden yesterday and mowed the lawns too, so it's all looking quite spiffy. The poppies are having a bumper year - the blooms are like dinner plates! And it looks as though there's going to be a good harvest of soft fruit.

Right now I'm going to take Bertie for a nice long walk somewhere and drop off some recycling stuff. Moving rooms spurred me into yet another de-clutter: I have too much junk! It must go!

18 May 2006

:: dumb and dumberer

I've had such a clunker of a day... first of all I locked myself out of the house. Again. I realised it as soon as I shut the door. I was on my way into town to collect my new digi-TV-DVD-recorder combo thingie (my old DVD player won't play a whole disc without overheating and stopping & the old digi-TV receiver is stuck on Channel 5, which is mainly CIS and plastic surgery) and taking Bertie along for a walk. Not a tragedy though, because I've left a set with next door because I'm always locking myself out.

The next dumberer moment was en route to work. I started to feel very chilly, which was odd given that it's a hot, muggy day. Then I realised it was because I'd put the air conditioning on. I hardly ever use it but it's a hot, muggy day ... Duh.

And then at work I tried to negotiate the heavy canteen doors while carrying several cups of coffee on a tray AND wearing a white shirt. I'll leave the rest to your imagination.

I haven't had much time with the DVD recorder because of all the tutuing around getting the spare keys etc, but it seems to be insanely complicated and wonderful. I got it from Argos, the cheap and cheerful warehouse place, and it was a bargain. I think I'll be able to copy my videos on to DVDs, and then I'll just have one box instead of a guddle of wires and remotes. The image quality is heaps better too. Still the same old telly though, which seems to just keep on keeping on.

The Cow Parade is here! Lots of amazing designs, though sadly some have been vandalised and one - Fruit Smooothy - has even vanished entirely.

There are a few outside work, this one's my favourite:

grrrrooovy

Over the Moo-n

More cow puns than you can shake a stick at.

4 May 2006

:: splashing out

It's a couple of years since I did any sailing and I really miss it. So I've been casting around for a water-based activity that won't be too hard on my poor old knees. I've long had a hankering to try scuba diving, but in the end the complexity of equipment, not to mention all the folderol of getting out to divable depths etc etc, is offputting. I'd probably end up only doing it on holidays, when what I really want is something I can do for a couple of hours on a whim.

So the latest thing I'm looking at is canoing or kayaking. I had a good talk to a chap in the Bosun's Locker shop at the marina and am just about ready to buy something. But it's so hard to decide! The cheapest option is a sit-on plastic kayak, but you wouldn't be able to do longer excursions on that; it's really just a fine-day fun thing. The next size of sit-on would be better. Then there are the kayaks and sea kayaks, which are more expensive but have more storage space and are good for longer trips.

My idea would be to keep the boat in the shed and trundle it to the slipway (you can get a lovely little set of wheels) when I fancied a spin. Eventually I could get a roofrack for the car and take it on holiday. I'd start out just doing a couple of hours pottering up and down the river close to home, but I'd like to work up to proper excursions, up to Blackness for example.

But obviously I would like to test-drive a kayak before shelling out £350+ for all the kit. The chandlers offers a quick turn around the bit of harbour immediately by the shop, but I want more like half a day to be sure it's for me. Today I talked to Iain about it - he's one of the instructors at the sailing school. He said I may be able to hire a kayak from them, but I'd have to talk to Ollie, the head of the sailing school. Happily I bumped into him a bit later; he wasn't as enthusiastic as Iain though (to be fair, it's hard to imagine anyone as enthusiastic as Iain - he's a one-off!). He cited safety rules etc etc, said they don't normally hire kayaks to individuals. He suggested taking a course. So I picked up a brochure and they have a weekend course for beginners, and a weekend sea kayaking course. That's the one for me, I reckon: "paddling, self-rescue, navigation and passage planning". You need "3 or 4 days' minimum experience", which I have - albeit from nearly 20 years ago; I did a week-long trip down the Wanganui back in the late 80s. I may do both courses, just to be sure.


This is the Necky Sky, which is a small "recreational" kayak. I like the look of it, though it wouldn't be suitable for longer trips. It doesn't have any storage space, just the bungee cords. You can fit a hatch, but it's a faff. The ones that are for longer trips are bigger, heavier and more expensive.



This is the cheapest option, an Ocean Kayak Frenzy - it's purely a fun boat. If I decide against kayaking long-distance, this would be nice for just the occasional splash around in a loch or river on a nice day.

The Bosuns Locker also sells inflatable kayaks, but I'd be too nervous of springing a leak to go far in one of those! Though the salesman said they are very sturdy and surprisingly good to paddle.

In other news: apparently our jobs are safe for at least a year. We had been very nervous as the axe swung in other departments - something our new owners call "synergy". But we have been assured there will be no cuts in our numbers.

Meanwhile I'm looking forward to hosting Margie, Jean and Rachel during their OE. They are in Spain at the moment and get here at the beginning of June. Hurrah!

Faye is still looking for work up here - she has an interview for one in Edinburgh that offers just a couple of days a week, which would be a start.

I'd better get ready for work!

17 April 2006

:: spring update

Ummmmmm.... As usual, I haven't been doing much.

The garden is a wreck, mainly due to the weather. But then this weekend (Easter) the weather hasn't been too bad and the garden is still a wreck. An attack of laziness, I'm afraid. I did tidy up out the back a bit, as it's almost nice enough out to breakfast outdoors, hurrah. And I potted up some lilies given to me by a friend I did some IT work for. The garlic has been trompled on a bit by a certain dog but is coming up nicely despite that.

The house is also a wreck, though not as much a wreck as next door - Frances has discovered an unexplained seepage above her front door, causing the wall to crumble away. Someone has checked out the plumbing and it seems ok, so now she's looking at the weeds growing out of the guttering and thinking maybe it's that. Mysterious that she's got no damp upstairs though. Touch wood, my place is at least structurally sound. Last year's leak from the header tank in the loft cracked the plaster skim on the wall in the hallway as it dried, but I can live with that. (And no, Frances' mystery damp isn't related to my leak - it's in a different spot altogether.)

Faye came to visit for a couple of days last week - she drove up overnight, having finished work at about 6pm on the Sunday, but got lost on the way up and ended up driving south again for an hour before realising her mistake. So she wisely stopped off at a hotel and continued in the morning. She's still looking for a job up here, no luck so far.

I've been on some lovely walks, got hailed on (Bertie is most baffled by hail - hey, who's throwing stones at us? stop it, it hurts!) and rained on, and on one glorious day slipped in fresh mud (while wiping away tears after being whipped in the face by a branch let slip by my neighbour, who was squelching up the path ahead of me) and actually slid a little ways downhill on my belly. My poor neighbour was mortified, but it was funny - I was giggling as I slid.

Another neighbour has a new puppy - a shar pei. I had to visit to meet it, because it's only just had its vaccination shots and isn't allowed out on the street. It's the cutest, sweetest pup, really adorable. She already has a chow chow and previously had akitas - she's keen on oriental breeds.

Speaking of unusual pets, I met a man taking his cat for a walk the other day! Luckily Bertie didn't spot it, so he had time to pick the cat up and I had time to get Bertie on the leash. The cat was very relaxed, but did give a warning growl when Bertie looked at it. He looked away again smartish - no way was he starting a fight! The man said the cat has already beaten up a doberman. Later on I spotted it sitting on the parcel shelf of his 4x4, a great big tabby with yellow eyes.

Bertie's in fine form - he's not had any accidents for a while now (touch wood). I did find a lump that worried me for a bit, but it's not gotten any bigger so the vet says it's probably ok. He certainly looks healthy, with a lovely sleek coat and the coldest, wettest nose around.

Work is fine - the new owners have been sacking people left and right but not in our department. Yet. I've never felt particularly secure, so after ten years on staff I'm used to worrying about being sacked!

27 March 2006

:: at auction

A while back I visited the website of an auction firm in Falkirk and signed up to get the catalogue for its weekly sales by email. So now I get this lovely weekly dip into People's Stuff. The regular sale is Wednesday evenings, so because I work nights I never get to go. But one of these weeks I'm going to take a Wednesday off specifically so I can.

This week's catalogue is a real gem. There's the usual torrent of "Misc Including Carlton etc" and "China Table Lamp", and "sign of the times" lots - "2 Radiograms £20-£30" and "Sel of Records & Videos £8-£12" (and I really want to know the difference between "Box of Misc" and "Box of Odds"). There are also comical mysteries: "Coq Au Van. £6-£10", "Enamel Bread Bin & Contents £10-£15", "Lark Yukelleli. £10-£15".

But a weird dissonance gathers as you read through. For example:

287 Moorland Fish Vase. £ 20.00 — £ 30.00
288 Murano Glass Vase. £ 25.00 — £ 40.00
289 Lorna Bailey Startled Cat. £ 20.00 — £ 30.00
290 Selection of Coronation Street Stars Autographs. £ 30.00 — £ 50.00
291 Nazi Cup Saucer & Spoon. £ 15.00 — £ 20.00
292 Bretby Honey Box & Cover. £ 15.00 — £ 30.00
293 2 Golf Club Heads. £ 10.00 — £ 20.00

Woah! Nazi cup saucer and spoon? There's Nazi stuff sprinkled throughout the catalogue, mostly medals and badges. I googled Lorna Bailey and found she designs the most vile, garish ceramics imaginable. I started to get a woozy vision of a Colonel Bufferish character ("Masonic Apron Sash Jewel etc. £25-£40")surrounded by stamp albums, military paraphenalia and golfing kit. His wife channels her repressed rage into a vast collection of china cats, dogs, rabbits, birds and pigs. Their house is crammed with furniture - "6 Tier Open Bookcase" and "Mahogany Corner Cabinet".

I like to think he's the one who popped his clogs and she's moving to the south of France with the proceeds from the sale.

23 March 2006

:: back by popular demand

OK, it was just Mog. But hey, at least I have A Reader.

Um, so, what have I been doing? My knees have been pretty good lately so I've been going on longer walks - on Sunday, for example, I went to the Pentlands and ended up hiking for about three or four hours.

Carnethy Hill from Turnhouse Hill

That's Carnethy Hill from Turnhouse Hill. In the olden days I would have kept on going over Carnethy and down the Old Kirk Road and walked back past the two reservoirs. But this time I felt a bit too knackered, so I cut straight down the hill. It looked easy from the top, ha ha! But it was incredibly steep and boggy too, so it was actually quite arduous. Plus because it's sheep country Bertie has to be on the lead. By this stage he was getting frustrated - "Come on, it's downhill! Shake a leg!" - and kept tugging on the lead. In the end I let him off, and he went crazy, zinging back and forth through the heather looking for the sheep. Luckily I managed to get him back on the lead before we got to them (they were at the bottom of the hill near the burn).

last of the snow

There was still a bit of snow around but it was pretty slushy. There's been a lot of snow around this winter (you can't really call it spring yet!) but very little in my neck of the woods. There was one decent fall at the beginning of this month but it only lasted a couple of days. There was another fall last week - see above for the remnants - but it lasted even less than that. And yesterday it snowed again but didn't lie.

handbrake turn

Bertie loved the big snowfall - all the dogs did.

In between breaks in the weather I managed to plant some garlic, but haven't done any other gardening. One of the lavender bushes out the front has died - I guess I should have protected it from the frost. Everything else looks ok though. Hungry rabbits have kept the back lawn neatly trimmed. There are healthy buds on all the fruit bushes.

I realise from looking back that I haven't finished telling about the redecorating. It's a typical tale. Dumb move number one was getting the double bed before painting the small bedroom - that meant there was nowhere to put the furniture. Duh. Cue a week of edging around piles of stuff. Anyhoo, once I had the room stripped I started right in with the left-over paint from my own bedroom, a nice blue. Just to see how that would look, you know. And it did look ok, but after a wall and a half it became apparent that I didn't have nearly enough paint. The finish on the existing paint was a strange semi-gloss and the blue went on very unevenly. It was a B&Q own brand, so off I went for some more. Why I thought they would have any I don't know. They didn't. And I couldn't be bothered driving to the other branches to see if they had any, so I spent another hour dithering over colour chips and samples before choosing something called Cafe Au Lait or Caramel or Light Mud or something. You get the picture. Dull.

Home again I got busy with the roller. Next day I was back at B&Q for another bucket. Paint paint paint. Every time I thought I was finished I'd see another patchy patch. It was gruesome. And such a horrible colour! What was I thinking? Why not a nice fresh yellow? I threw everything back in, made the bed, put up the curtains and it still looked horrible. But I can't be bothered to do it again so it'll just have to stay like that.

The only other DIY I've done since then is to put doors on one of my bookshelves in the dining room, thus creating a cupboard for liquor and teatowels. How posh am I!

The city council is doing some redecorating though - they're fixing up the Ferry Glen walk. The glen is a beautiful little chunk of steeply-sloping woodland with a stream plunging down at one end. It did have a path through it but it's been neglected over the years and has mostly been washed away. For the past couple of weeks the sound of chainsaws has been loud as workmen clear out dead and sickly trees, chip them and spread the chips as mulch. They've had heavy machinery in too, widening the path and laying gravel and hard core. It's nearly finished.

under construction

There are still some trees waiting to be cut down. I'm going to miss some of them!

doomed

21 February 2006

:: rubbish!

I went on a litter-picking walk today. I do it occasionally - there's a few of us in the town do it, it's thankless but if we didn't the place would be knee-deep in cider empties and sweetie wrappers. So anyway I was down the bank with my litter-picker (kindly donated by Joyce from CleanFerry) scrabbling after supermarket bags when an old bloke with a spaniel stopped to congratulate me.

"You're doing a great job. But the council should be doing it!" He launched into a truly British rant about how he'd phoned up the head of the cleansing department about getting the path cleaned up, and he'd said it wasn't the council's job, but then next thing they'd cleaned the path!

I didn't tell about about Joyce's sterling work getting CleanFerry going, about the hundreds of bulbs she and her team planted along the Ferry Glen path, about the flower tubs she organised all along the High Street ... because he was into another stream about how he'd pestered the council about a load of empty bottles somewhere. And then he said: "I'm not saying you shouldn't do what you're doing, it's great - but I use the phone." And off he went!

OK he was old - but probably younger than the most energetic litter-picker, a chap who not only clambers down the bank after the cider empties but also recycles everything he can. And it's such a British attitude, to stand around yapping about how someone else should clean up the mess. Pommie whingers. It's made me even more motivated to pick up litter.

Gadget latest: Good news! The new FM transmitter arrived from Canada and worked like a dream, right out of the package. Fantastic! I'm now filling in forms to try and get compensation for the old one from the Royal Mail. I emailed them about it on the very day that they were fined £11.4 million for losing so much mail; I don't know how that will affect my claim.

Bertie says hi:

pooooooor bertie, his life is so hard

10 February 2006

:: gadget update

I mailed my non-functioning FM transmitter back to the dudes in Dundee, waited a week then emailed them to ask if they got it. They say not. So I've written that off (though of course I will keep hassling them for a refund) and ordered another one - from a firm in Canada this time. It's a bit more expensive but has whizzy features like a curly cord. It also has very good reviews and the blurb promises that "no matter what, you will be able to transmit".

I soooo want this to work!

:: schadenfreude

There's this bit of road on the way home that's particularly annoying, especially to the driver who's had a super-stressful night at work and at 1.30am is looking forward to slumping on the sofa with a hot drink and the remote control. It's right on the outskirts of the city, and after you go over the bridge, out of the built-up area, there's an upward sweep and the road becomes a motorway. Here's the catch, though: the speed limit rises from 40mph to 70mph halfway up the slope. So the temptation is for the tired, stressed-out night worker is to accelerate up the slope, giving her underpowered, girly car the momentum to reach the top without having to change down to avoid slowing.

Imagine my chagrin then, when I succumbed to that temptation a couple of years back and saw flashing blue lights in my rear-view mirror. I didn't get a ticket or anything but had to go through various humiliations, including lying on the passenger seat to grapple with the bonnet catch (the cops were men, I guess they just like to look at engines). Since then I've been fairly scrupulous about not going over 50mph before I get to the open limit sign. This means I'm fairly often passed at speed by other cars - which really gets up my nose, especially at 1.30am after a super-stressful night at work. Why aren't they caught? Why just me? They're going much faster than I was when I was caught (52mph for the record - there's some sort of 10%-plus-4 rule of thumb for safe speeding).

Last night I was doing my scrupulous 48-and-a-bit-mph run-up to the hill when a car whizzed past me, a souped-up lad's car with too many headlights, you know the kind. Grrr, I thought. Then another car whizzed past, and would you believe it, it was a police car! "Faster, you idiot, faster! You'll never catch them!" I yelled as I accelarated recklessly over 50mph. "They're getting away!" I screeched as they went past the turnoff at what looked like a snail's pace. Round the bend though, I saw a wonderful sight: blue flashing lights. Yessss! Take that, boy racers, and stick it up your tailpipe! Ha ha ha!!

Yep, it doesn't take much to cheer me up these days: a clump of snowdrops, sunshine on the first blush of blossom, blue lights flashing for someone else.

The Liberal Democrats have just thrashed Labour in the Dunfermline by-election. There's a turn-up for the books. Everyone thought Labour would win by a slim margin - it had a big majority last time. And it's a definite win, majority of 2,000-odd. Wow.

Back to work....

20 January 2006

:: Inspector Gadget

Wah! My latest gadget doesn't work. My new car has a CD player, so I haven't been able to listen to my MP3 player via the tape-deck adaptor. Last month I went in to an electronics store and asked if a CD adaptor had been invented yet. No, it hasn't, said the nice young man (they don't have personal jet packs yet either, or Star Trek-style replicators). But! There is this gadget which is kind of illegal so we don't sell it but you can get it on the internet.

Yes!! It ticks all my boxes already and I don't even know what it is!

What it is, is an FM transmitter. You plug it in to the headphone socket of your MP3 player and it broadcasts a signal which you can pick up on your car radio. How cool is that?

So I went on the internet and found one and ordered it and it arrived yesterday. There was no manual with it and it was different from the model I'd ordered, but it seemed simple enough. I read up on other transmitters and did all the right things. That is, I sat in my car for ages with the motor idling, stepping my car radio through the frequencies looking for a gap, then tuning the gadget to that frequency and waving the gadget round trying to get the radio to pick up the transmission. I don't know what my neighbours thought I was up to.

But it doesn't work, waaaah! And the firm doesn't answer my emails, double wah! Happily I bought it through Amazon, which has a policy whereby if a reseller doesn't refund then they will. It's not the money though - it wasn't that expensive - it's the disappointment! I really wanted it to work. Bah.

In other news, I have next week off to really get stuck into the DIY. I spent a sweaty weekend getting the blinds secured in the spare room and moving furniture around ready for the new bed, which arrived right on schecule on Monday and is nice and comfy. I still have a heap of work to do though, so a week off will be perfect. I also hope to do some long walks, weather permitting (it's apparently coming over from Russia, though Scotland will miss the worst).

Tomorrow I have to visit the marina to look at the latest redevelopment plans. I'm taking my camera and will post some shots.

No winner in the EuroMillions lottery tonight: the jackpot rolls over to £100 million next week. £100 million!

4 January 2006

:: DIY oh why

How hard could it be?

The spare room needs some work, no doubt about it. I've ordered a double bed, so couples can stay in comfort. The window had a blind, a cheap one that was starting to sag in the middle because of the width it was stretching across. So the plan was to trim the blind back and fit it into the actual window space, and put up some curtains as well, for a "window treatment" effect. Flash, eh?

So I went to Ikea on Monday for curtains for the spare room and the small bedroom, which will now house the single bed. This room used to have a venetian blind, but it came crashing down during cleaning operations last month, smashing the brackets. After much mulling at Ikea (which, it being a public holiday, was crowded with people mulling and their bored, bawling children), I chose curtains, rods and finials, plus a nice frame for a gorgeous print Mum sent me for Christmas. Got home and realised I'd forgotten to get brackets for the rods. Sigh, tsk, etc. Yesterday morning I went back thinking that at least Ikea wouldn't be so crowded, only to find it was so insanely busy that the carpark was full. It felt crazy to have to battle the crowds for such a tiny purchase.

Last night I took down the blind, cut it to the approximate size, discovered it was still too wide and cut it again. Then I unscrewed the brackets and repositioned them, after drilling holes in the surround and causing a large crack in the masonry on one side. Sigh, tsk, etc. Fitted the trimmed blind into place, admired the general effect and rolled it up. Blind came crashing down. Sigh, tsk, etc. I've put it back up but I'll have to reposition the brackets somehow to make it secure.

The next step was to put up the brackets for the curtain rods, and that went fairly smoothly, apart from having to take them down again after discovering that the screw that grips the pole is positioned so that it couldn't be loosened in situ except with a very short screwdriver, which of course I don't have. By this stage I was too exhausted and filthy to contemplate hemming the curtains, so I haven't quite finished. But it's going to look lovely.

In between bouts of Ikea and DIY, I went on a few lovely walks. One was along Roslin Glen, which I haven't done for years. Bertie loved that one - a new walk! With extra mud!

roslin castle

Roslin Castle, right next to Rosslyn Chapel (which is under heavy scaffolding and doesn't look romantic at all). Click here for fascinating information about the castle, including the legend of the big scary dog. As soon as I let Bertie off the lead, just under the castle walls, he went hurtling off in the wrong direction. I whistled him back and he came flying, but didn't see me and dashed past, scaring the bejesus out of a young couple coming the other way. Maybe they'd just been reading about the legend!

1 January 2006

:: Happy New Year!

Dogmanay

Just back in from a big long walk around Holyrood Park, plus a side trip to Linlithgow. Holyrood Park was hotching today - there was the annual One O'Clock Run, the Bicycle Triathlon and Dogmanay, aka husky racing. Bertie was freaked out by the crowds and by the husky-racing commentary, which was echoing round the hills and crags. "HIKE AWAY hike away hike away ay ay HIKE AWAY hike away ay ay YIYIYIYI yiyiyiyiyi!!!!!!!!!" Poor dog was completely baffled. I had imagined the huskies would have been running on a trail in the hills, but they were confined to quite a small oval down on the flat by the palace, running just two teams at a time. I squeezed through to watch a couple of races but they weren't very thrilling: the dogs didn't seem to be taking them seriously at all, some teams were barely running & the mushers were having to scoot their carts along. Bertie was all a-tremble with fear and excitement - "Is she cold?" people asked constantly.

As it was a nice day I drove on past Queensferry to Linlithgow for a walk by the loch. It was much, much colder there, though, so we didn't linger.

Linlithgow Loch

I had a quiet New Year's Eve - quiet that is apart from the sound of a dog alternately barking and frantically trying to dig a hole in a corner of the livingroom. I phoned Pinky just after the Bells and had to raise my voice to be heard over the racket. You're supposed to just ignore them, according to the dog behaviourists, otherwise you can inadvertantly reward the activity. But it's hard to ignore such a carry-on! He'd been pretty good most of the evening; there were fireworks earlier but I left the radio on (Classic FM) and all the curtains pulled and he slept on. But at midnight there was a loud volley across the road and behind the house too.

I have another couple of days off and will spend them doing a spot of shopping and DIY. Faye's coming to stay next month, and then Margaret, Jean and Rachael in June, so I've decided to freshen up the spare room. I'm going to put a double bed in there, and move the single bed into the small bedroom that was my study before I got the laptop. I'm going to shop for a bed in the sales tomorrow. I'm also going to paint the small bedroom - it's the one room that hasn't been done yet. Both spare bedrooms need curtains as well, something else I hope to get in the sales. The small room used to have venetians, but they broke with a crash last month - the brackets snapped off.

I may move the old desktop computer into the larger room, I'll see what works best. The big spare bedroom is where Bertie's bed is, so he may have to move. I remember when I decorated my bedroom and moved my furniture in there: my kingsize bed happened to go where Bertie's bed was, and he just assumed I was giving it to him and was mightily pissed off to be booted off!

16 December 2005

:: I have the powah

After weeks of grinding my teeth, suddenly it all flows. The car is booked in for a service next Tuesday and a courtesy car will be provided (at first they said no, I'd have to wait two weeks for a courtesy car but I put my foot down quite hard & they capitulated. I would have demanded the sales manager's car if they'd stuck to their guns!).

A new certificate of motor insurance is winging its way to me as well. Yesterday I had the humiliation of going to the PO to renew my tax disc only to discover I had the wrong insurance certificate - and I couldn't find the right one anywhere. (For kiwis: the tax disc is a windscreen sticker that shows you've paid your registration fee; insurance is compulsory over here, so you have to prove you've got it before you can get a tax disc.)

And being on a roll, when I got to work I immediately spotted something set up wrong that could have resulted in mayhem later on, and not only that but I found a simple and elegant solution.

I'm so glad that sticky patch is over. I have a lot of stuff to do this weekend! First off tomorrow is the Christmas work do - lunch in an Italian restaurant followed by drinks at a pub up the road.

13 December 2005

:: nothing's ever that simple

When I bought a shiny, nearly-new Ford to replace my ageing, clapped-out Peugeot, I was savvy enough to ask for a service record. There wasn't one, but the salesman said it should have had a service, and promised to track down the record for me. This is where my savvy came undone. I believed him! I know! A used car salesman!

Six months on I still haven't got the record. Not only that - it transpires I haven't got the service record because there isn't one: the car has never been serviced. So now I'm waiting for the Ford service centre to phone to arrange for a service - no doubt at a time of maximum inconvenience.

Mind you, any time until after New Year would be a time of maximum inconvenience. Unless they give me a courtesy car - some friends with an Audi have a brand-new one to tool around in while their airconditioning leak is sorted out. I'm not used to these little luxuries: with my old car I would drop it at the local garage on my way home from work and pick it up on my way to work the next day. But the Ford service place is out in industrial estate country, near the bypass.

I'm starting to feel like that League of Gentlemen character: "Are you local?" I've abandoned my fancy-pants city hairdresser for the local salon. And it's so liberating! I popped in (popping in is such a "local" thing to do, isn't it?) yesterday and made an appointment for today. Left home two minutes before the appointment and arrived bang on time. Half an hour later I was home with glossy, neatly trimmed hair, for a fraction of the price. My previous hairdresser was originally "local", in that his salon was just up the road from my old flat. But then high rents drove them out to a bustling suburb, and news of his excellence meant he got busier and more expensive, while I moved out here. I'd have to book weeks in advance, then drive in (it was either that or two buses), spend ages looking for a park, pay a small fortune and drive home (half an hour each way). Local is the way to go.

2 December 2005

:: plumb crazy

The plumber-who-put-Jack's-bath-in-wrong wasn't busy at all. He - or rather his underling - rang the doorbell at 9am on Thursday, the day after I phoned. Underling, an extremely reserved youth, scurried up the ladder into the loft and had the ballcock replaced in a jiffy. He didn't have a timer in the van, he said, so he'd be back later.

I popped up to the loft and put the lid back on the header tank and tucked in its cosy insulation. It is winter, after all.

Underling returned at lunchtime. He had the old timer off in a jiffy but couldn't work out how to fit the new one. After a phone call his boss arrived. I sat in on the lesson in How to Replace a Timer and I think I could do it myself now. Apparently it's reasonably important to make a note of which wire goes where, or else you may fuse the switch and get told off and have to run out to the van for a new fuse and a better screwdriver. Also, it's good to turn off the switch before poking at live wires with said screwdriver.

Eventually they got the thing wired up, but then the heating wouldn't come on. It's your solenoid, Bossman said. Eh? Then the heating came on. "It should come on right away," he said. "It came on right away last night," I replied. He denied having caused solenoidal problems & suggested I replace it - "forty quid". When I balked, pointing out that it was actually still working, he suddenly noticed the lack of ventilation.

Uh oh. Next thing Underling is hurrying out to the van for a notice, which Bossman duly affixed to the front of the gas heater.

WARNING

Every time a gas plumber comes to my house I end up with a notice tied to the heater. Scottish Gas do nice big yellow ones. The real scunner though was when he came back the next morning (9am again) with a form for me to sign, presumably absolving himself of all responsibility in the event of me dying of carbon monoxide poisoning. I don't know, I was still asleep when I signed it.

The new timer is a snazzy electronic number, though it does pretty much the same job as the old one. Which had a sticker on the back showing that it was over 20 years old!

dead heating timer clock backplate

The new timer won't need to last that long - I'm planning to get a new system in the next couple of years.

I'm really tired of those warnings.

29 November 2005

:: stood up

How naive was I, thinking the plumber would come today just because he said he would? He said tea-time, which I narrowed down to "around five or six". I waited until 7.30 before phoning. He'd forgotten. He couldn't come now because he was going out. And then he got angry with me! It was like I'm some kind of mad stalker who keeps ringing him up. He's too nice to just say no, so he doesn't show up and hopes I'll stop calling. We had a big fight and now we're through. Sob.

Tomorrow I'll try someone else, maybe the other local plumber, the one who put Jack's new bathroom in but put the wrong slant on the bath so that water collects in the wastepipe and smells musty. He probably won't be busy.

Aside from that it was an ok day - did some housework, did some computer stuff (very satisfying, actually, though far too geeky to go into here - I solved a problem with my old computer that I had thought was insoluble).

And, I now have "Happy Birthday" down pat on the guitar and have started on "Ode to Joy". It's trickier because you pluck with two fingers - it's going to take forever to learn, but it's lovely. I prefer picking to chords, though I'm also practising some blues style riffing.

25 November 2005

:: birthdays

Having been pretty slack about sending out birthday greetings this year I was touched at how many people remembered mine! Presents included matching teacosy and scarf, fromm Pinky and Mum respectively. The scarf, bought in Dunedin (I assume) is light purple and the teacosy, bought in Auckland, is red, but they're made of the same kind of yarn, a wild hairy stuff. All very apt for today, when we got a fierce blast of weather from the Arctic. Lots of places got thick snow (including the south-west of England), but we just got sleet, which is miserable stuff.

Many thanks to everyone.

It's Bertie's birthday tomorrow - he'll be eight, which makes him about my age now. He's going quite grey and getting very grumbly and set in his ways. I was cursing him this morning - how delicious it would have been to have sat there reading as the sleet lashed the windows. How undelicious it was to struggle into several layers of woollies and waterproofs and trudge around the town.

Bizarrely the firm that looks after the gardens of the flats across the road chose today to turn up. They were trimming and mowing for a few hours in the worst of the weather. Otherwise it was just the dogwalkers out and about.

I'm still having plumbing woes. The main woe now is trying to get anyone to sort out my plumbing woes. It's frustrating because I'm pretty sure I could do it myself, but I'm too scared in case I a) bring down the ceiling (header tank) or b) blow the place up (timer clock). So I'm reduced to phoning the Recommended Plumber every day.

"So, do you think you can come this afternoon?"
"Weeeeellll, I might be able to get over before half three, but to tell you the truth I'm strugglin. We're so busy just now, and I've got to get these jobs finished before Christmas."
"What? You mean to say that even if you can come round and look at mine, you won't have time to do the actual work?"
"If I could just come round in the evening ... it's getting there by half three that's the problem."

So anyway now he's coming round on Monday evening, my day off. I suspect I will be very, very lucky to get anything done before Christmas. The alternative is to ring 500 other plumbers, who will all be too busy except for the one who has messed up so many jobs he doesn't get any repeat work. So as it's not urgent I'll just let the Recommended Plumber work through his To Do list.

In the meantime maybe I should drop some dye in the header tank so the icicles in the honeysuckle are nice festive colours.

13 November 2005

:: heavy duty

Pretty tiring week, one way and another - work in particular is tiring, and then there was a couple of nights of broken sleep due to a combination of gale-force winds and nervous dogs, Ozzy in particular. He also freaked out when my Saturday morning paper was delivered (at 6:30am - who knew? my respect for the newsagent just trebled). Last night was tranquil, however, so I feel refreshed and ready for work - which is just as well, because it will be hard.

Ozzy is settling in really well. He's lying on the sofa next to me as I type this (loving the laptop! surfing from the sofa!) worn out after a long walk. He's always on the alert though - his ears are up. Bertie, aka Mr Mogadon, is upstairs, completely joed out.

ozzy!

opposites attract

I've got tomorrow off, and am determined to use it wisely - the main project is getting to grips with the header tank.

10 November 2005

:: guess who's coming for your dinner?

Ozzy!

Yes, the terrierist is back - for eight sleeps, this time. Penny said she told him this morning that he was going to see Bertie and he ran to the door, crying with excitment. Bertie is cool! Bertie has fun toys and great-tasting food! Bertie catches real live hedgehogs!

So at lunchtime Ozzy came bursting through the door and took charge. He checked out the food dish (yum! tasty!), tried out the toys, chewed on a bone, climbed on the furniture. But Bertie still wins when it comes to wildlife - he led the charge into the back yard to chase off the two rabbits and the squirrel that pretty much seem to have taken up permanent residence out there.

Ozzy has calmed down quite a bit since his last stay and he should be ok. So long as the fox keeps its yap shut at night, anyway.

I think I cracked the plumbing crisis: the water is now trickling out of a pipe that emerges from under the eaves. That means a problem with the header tank ballcock, probably. At some point over the weekend I'll get a proper inspection light and have a good look. I can bend the ballcock bar as a short-term fix, but I might have to replace the assembly in the end. That should be easy enough, though my big problem with these kind of jobs is finding the shutoff tap and draining things down. I also have a morbid fear of falling through the ceiling. (I'm fairly sure Ozzy would eat me after a couple of days.)

And I do remember the bathroom tap ordeal, when changing the washers turned into a mole wrench nightmare of epic proportions. I kind of almost know what I'm doing, which is in some ways worse than not knowing anything at all and getting a plumber in. It's cheaper though!

6 November 2005

:: Guy Fawkes

After 400 years, isn't it time to give it a rest?

happy guy fawkes night?

I used to love fireworks, and now I hate them nearly as much as Bertie does. The DAP doesn't seem to have any effect at all. Last night the racket was so bad he tore up his duvet in a frenzy of fear. He also barked and cried and paced around. Finally BBC Radio 2 playing loudly upstairs and in the kitchen seemed to put him into something like a coma. He was in a froth from when he heard the first bang - at about 4pm, while we were out on a walk - right through until about 11pm.

Tonight isn't quite so bad - the first few explosions rattled him but he settled down on the shredded remains of his duvet to listen to PJ Proby and Elvis. But then it got bad and he had a couple of hours of barking and crying and pacing. He's settled down again now (operetta and hits from the musicals) - I hope that's it. Poooooor boy!

One of the neighbours is giving his dog a natural remedy for fireworks misery - since DAP seems to have been rather a waste of time, I might try that. I think the problem with the pheromones is that Bertie doesn't sleep in one room most of the time - he like to move around the house, so he's probably not getting enough of a treatment to affect him greatly.

3 November 2005

:: loft living

I spent half the morning teetering around the loft with a torch, desperately looking for leaks. It's a big space, criss-crossed with wooden roofbeams. There's no lighting and no floor, just the ceilings joists and various bits of wood - old doors and such. The long-term plan is to put up a proper loft ladder and floor at least part of it. For the meantime, getting up there involves climbing a stepladder through a hatch in the hallway ceiling.

So there I am, balancing on a joist, torch in hand, grubbing around in the insulation. Some of this is pink fibreglass batts, but a lot of it is ... well I don't know - it looks like kapok. Piles of yellowish fluff.

It was tricky working out where I was in relation to the leak. Every bit of ceiling I looked at was dry. The roof seemed completely sound, which was good, but the lack of water was mystifying. At long last I found some slightly damp insulation and a small patch of mould. Hurrah! And then I spotted what I hope is the culprit: a plastic pipe exiting from a small header tank (for the hot water tank, I think) had come adrift. It seems to be an overflow pipe. I jammed it back together again, but I will have to go back up armed with gaffer tape and a better light. And maybe some planks! There was one terrifying moment when I lost my balance and nearly trod heavily on the bedroom ceiling. Managed to grab a beam at the last minute, wrenching my shoulder but at least not plunging down through a new skylight.

2 November 2005

:: something nasty in the attic

Just before I left for work today, for some reason my eyes strayed to the ceiling in the upstairs hallway (rolling my eyes at something on the radio, probably). And I noticed a bulge. A downwards bulge, like the kind of bubble you get in bad paintwork, only bigger. I had a book in my hand, so I very gently poked the bulge. It gave gracefully, and when I'd finished poking at it, it smoothly rebulged.

I looked at the floor. Was that a tiny damp patch on the carpet? Aiee! I took a towel from the hotwater cupboard (coincidentally right under the bulge) and tossed it on the suspect spot. Who knows what I'll find when I get home. But I'll be phoning a plumber in the morning - right after I've climbed up into the loft to investigate.

My best guess is that the header tank or its piping is leaking and that there's a big puddle up there, with its deepest point over the bulge. I might even be able to mend it myself, with some gaffer tape!

28 October 2005

:: all DAP-ed out

For the past week I've been treating Bertie with DAP - Dog Appeasement Pheromone - to help him with fireworks anxiety. He is now so thoroughly appeased he can't be bothered to get out of bed in the morning. He sets out on the morning walk at a gentle waddle rather than his usual eager trot. After I got home from work last night he had to be woken up for his late-night wander; usually he's pestering me to go walkies - it's his main chip-scavenging run. Today he strolled past a group of squealing teenagers with barely a glance. He's dozy and dopey and right now he's completely joed out in the livingroom.

all DAP-ed out

27 October 2005

:: Okney travelogue, part two

Where was I? The Tomb of the Eagles. After the talk I was shown into the "wet room" to choose my oilskins - trousers in my case. They also had jackets and wellies. Then I headed off down a farm track in the wind and rain to the first site, the settlement. On the way I met the farmer, who had apparently been out there all day sitting in the caravan where he gives his own talk. My own "talk" was brief.

"You know about the settlement?" he said.
"Errr ... it's over there," I replied.
"Ah, you'll be all right then," he said, patting my shoulder. And then he buzzed off on his battered 50cc motobike, accompanied by a couple of slinking sheepdogs.

home-made visitor centre
The caravan at the settlement.

Trudge, trudge, trudge, through the rain I went. The ancient green caravan was the most picturesque part of the settlement, so although the site was interesting, I didn't linger there. Trudge, trudge, trudge, onward and seaward. At what seemed like the edge of the known world, there was the tomb, facing the cliff's edge. No decorous stooping here - you have to get down and crawl. Or, if like me you have bum knees, you lie on your back on a skateboard-like affair and haul yourself down the tunnel using a rope.

Tomb of the Eagles
Outside the tomb. The plastic containers hold knee pads and mitts for the crawlers.

The tomb's interior was underwhelming - a stone chamber with side chambers - but knowing that at sunrise on one day a year the light strikes the back wall made it special. And the view of of wind-tossed waves through the tunnel was striking. But for me the main draw of this place was the effort you had to make to see it: it's not a passive, theme-park experience; you have to work at it, and you do get a strong impression of how it might have been, back then. Having held the eagle's talons in my hand I could imagine the great birds "excarnating" the bodies before the remaining bones were gathered up and stored in the tomb, for example. It's a great place and I recommend it.

Inside the Tomb of the Eagles

I'm finding it hard to remember quite what I did when! Certainly after seeing the Tomb of the Eagles I drove home, took Bertie on a walk (he was asleep in the car while I was tomb-crawling) and slumped on the sofa for the rest of the evening. That's the great thing about having a flat when you're on holiday - you can eat dinner lying down. Not many restaurants offer recumbent dining.

The next day it rained and rained, so of course I went for a looong walk. I did intend to "do" some museums etc, but after "doing" Skara Brae - brilliantly well-preserved 5,000-year-old village - I wanted to stay out in the open. Skara Brae is fab. The village was buried in sand until a storm in the 1850s revealed it. The most complete house has been recreated near the visitor centre, complete with plastic food, sheepskins and so on, and seems pretty cosy. The guide on duty at the site was excellent, knowledgable and enthusiastic. He was especially eloquent about the plumbing system the ancients installed! The drains still work, apparently - they keep the houses nice and dry.


Skara Brae

So then I drove on and quite by accident arrived at the Brough of Birsay at low tide. There's yet another ancient settlement there, and a ruined church, this time on a headland that's only accessible via a low causeway. Very slippery but fun.

causeway

I thought I'd be able to go up to the lighthouse, but it was strictly off limits for dogs due to sheep. Tsk. So instead we had a loooong walk along the coast to Skipi Geo, a lovely little cove dotted with "nousts", little hollows that were used to store fishing boats. Each local family had its own noust. They're not used now. (The house my flat was part of is called The Noust.)

coastal art
Whale vertebra on a pole, Skipi Geo.

The rain was really quite heavy by now and I was damp, so it was back into the car for a drive home the long way, and another night indoors. I did stop off in Stromness at one point to do some shopping and take photos, but the visit was cut short after Bertie had a big wobbly fit on seeing several cats just strolling around. And then some children tried to make friends with him. Too much excitement!

Is that it? I think so. On the last day we had one final walk along the cliff path to the Earl's Bu, then I jammed everything back in the car, said goodbye to the flat's owner and headed off to the ferry. It was a much nicer day, with almost no wind, so it was a shame to be leaving.

morning walk
Orphir on the last morning of my stay.

I drove straight back home, stopping off for a good walk near a tiny village called Latheronwheel, and again at the Falls of Bruar just before dusk. After that the weather packed in and the drive became something of a nightmare. Just outside Perth, on a long uphill haul, I pulled out into the fast lane to let a lorry in from a slip road. A van shot out from behind the lorry and overtook it - and I had to bang the brakes on hard to avoid hitting it. In the rain. In the dark. Aiiieee! One positive element was that the emergency services were busy dealing with an accident on the other carriageway, so if I had hit the van, they would have been able to cut me out of the wreckage fairly quickly.

It was lovely getting home safe and sound. A hot bath, a glass of wine and all was right with the world!

25 October 2005

:: Orkney travelogue, part one

About time I shared some of the highlights of my holiday, before I forget. Click here to see photos.

I had a good drive up - the weather was clear and there wasn't a lot of traffic. I stopped off at Helmsdale, a little burg on the north-east coast. Very nice B&B - the man of the house was a fishing boat skipper and the house was right on the quay. The landlady and her sister were off to the Western Isles for the weekend for the Mod, the annual Gaelic cultural competition/festival. She belongs to a local Gaelic choir and her sister was along for company. In the morning she cooked Bertie a couple of sausages.

And so on to Scrabster, a fairly grotty little ferry port right near Thurso on the north coast. There was an hour or so to spare so I found a walk to a ruined chapel along the coast a step. The ferry trip was fairly smooth, although it was a windy day. I got chatting to a couple who turned out to be from the very village I was staying in!

I drove pretty much straight to said village, Orphir, which is roughly midway between Stromness, the ferry port, and Kirkwall, Orkney's main town. The flat was ideal, a roomy one-bedroom place with kitchen/livingroom and showerroom. The shower was fantastic, and everything was really comfortable. All mod cons, including microwave, TV, CD player/radio etc. I soon found a good walk for Bertie - down the road past the fields to the coast, then along a footpath to the Earl's Bu, the ruins of a Viking drinking hall, and back home along the road. Just lovely, and I did it every morning.

So: the highlights. There are so many sights it wasn't hard to be busybusybusy every day. First visit was to Stenness, for the Ring of Brodgar, a wonderful stone circle, and Maes Howe, a neolithic burial mound. This is like a smaller version of Newgrange in Ireland. Having seen Newgrange I suppose I was a little disappointed by Maes Howe: there was work in progress to repair the concrete roof and the guide wasn't the most enthused I've ever met. He wasn't even a Scot, let alone Orcadian! However, the tomb itself is interesting and has a lot of Viking grafitti. The Ring of Brodgar is wonderful - the stones are beautiful and the setting is sublime, on a neck of land between two lochs. The sun flashed out for a couple of minutes so I got some nice shots. I didn't take any photos at Maes Howe - most uninspiring.

The next day was grim - windy and cold - but after the morning walk I set out for the Churchill Barriers. Oh, first of all I walked round Kirkwall and visited St Magnus Cathedral, a magnificent building full of wonderful memorials and carvings and windows. So then I headed down the chain of islands - first stop was the Italian Chapel, built by prisoners of war on Lamb Holm. It's gorgeous.

I was ready for a walk so stopped fairly randomly at a likely-looking spot just by one of the barriers (causeways between the islands built as wartime defences for the Scapa Flow). Lo and behold there were a bunch of kids surfing! They had wetsuits on and boy did they need them - it was perishing. It started to rain while I was there and continued to rain pretty much through the next day. Also at that spot was a startling piece of sculpture, what I guess was a Jarl's head, with a winged helmet.

After the walk I pressed on south, heading for the Tomb of the Eagles, which had been highly recommended to me by a bloke at work. It is on a farm on South Ronaldsay, the southernmost island reachable from Mainland via the barriers, so it took a while to get there but it was totally worth it.

It's another prehistoric chambered tomb and it was discovered and opened for visitors by the farmer on whose land it is. The family has made a visitor centre at the farm house, with various bits and pieces they found in the tomb and at another site, a settlement, including pottery, skulls and stone tools. The farmer's daughter gave a really good talk, during which she passed round artefacts. It really is amazing to handle a piece of pottery tens of thousands of years old!

more later ... time for bed.

23 October 2005

:: some pix are in

I'm back from Orkney - had a great time of course. I haven't got time just now to write a travelogue, but there are photos to look at on flickr. I've got loads more to post too, when I get a minute.

I'm writing this in the ten minutes spare before my dinner guests arrive. I'm doing lamb chops and roasted vegetables (potatoes, tomatoes, aubergine & onions) with rosemary sprigs and garlic. I don't have too much confidence in the recipe - it's by Nigel Slater, who is my top favourite cook, but I had quite a time in the butchers yesterday buying the chops & they don't look anything like the ones in the magazine photo. The butcher didn't have any neck chops left - the woman who bought them was following a recipe from Jamie Oliver's new book! - so he carved up some ribs, yelling at me the whole time that they would be MUCH better than neck chops because neck chops only have a tiny amount of flesh on them. He said if they weren't delicious I could get my money back, but only if I bring them back to the shop and he tastes them and agrees. "If I lose a finger here it's your fault!" he bellowed as he sawed away at the bones. I love butchers.

I was so worried I went and bought gigot chops at Tesco today, because they look more like the ones in the picture. But they're only a fall-back in case the butcher chops don't work.

Oh, my lucky guests. Can't you tell I don't give dinner parties very often? This is my second in this house and I've been here for five and a half years.

The starter is Orkney herrings and marinated salmon rolls, salad and oatcakes, pudding is gooseberry crumble with yogurt or icecream.

Bertie's guest, Ozzy, is having Greyhound Maintenance biscuits and fresh tap water.

9 October 2005

:: king kong done gone

ingliston market

WAH! I missed the news completely (see below), so imagine my shock and dismay when I went to Ingliston market today and it was all gone! No secondhand stalls, no dodgy dealings by the gates, no burger vans, no racks of horrid sportswear, no offers to unlock phones, no piles of pirate DVDs. Nuffin. A bunch of blokes in cars watching the planes land and take off (what's that about?), a helicopter taking on passengers in a field. Boo hoo hoo!

bargain mirror
This lovely mirror cost just £2 at Ingliston!

And even if the market does resurrect somewhere else, the gorilla won't be pink any more!

the ingliston gorilla

From The Edinburgh Evening News 4 Oct 2005:

FOR years he towered over proceedings at Edinburgh's biggest market, helping reunite thousands of lost children with their parents.

But now the giant, bright pink King Kong statue, which was a landmark at Ingliston Market for more than 30 years, has been taken away after the market's closure. The 22ft-high gorilla statue, which became famous at the market as a meeting point for separated parents and their children, is to be resurrected at the market's new site.

But Spook Erections, the owner of the market, which was axed last month, has still not disclosed the location of the new site.

Plans to expand the airport prompted the market's closure amid fears the current site would be swallowed up.

A spokeswoman for Spook Erections said the gorilla, which was uplifted from the Ingliston site yesterday, would undergo repairs and a makeover before being settled into his new home.

She said: "Unfortunately, he was pushed over by some vandals before the last market, so he wasn't able to take part in that upright.

"He has some damage to his back and has broken his arm, so he needs to be repaired before we can put him up at the new site.

"The planning application for the new site hasn't been finalised yet, so we're not allowed to put him there yet anyway. We shall reveal the new location soon."

She added that the gorilla, which was grey until four years ago when current market owner Lesley Maby, boss of Spook Erections, decided to paint him shocking pink, would undergo a colour change.

She said: "He will also be painted a different colour, though I don't know what that will be yet. It will be a surprise when the market reopens."

The gorilla, which weighs 890kg, was erected at the market in 1973, three years after it opened.

The spokeswoman said: "He was part of a range of unusual and fun things that the owner of the time, Mr Maby, a relative of Lesley, decided he wanted to introduce to the market."

David Dixon, of Neil Williams Haulage, was in charge of removing the gorilla from his old home and putting him in storage.

He said: "He is a real Ingliston landmark. He's been there for years and years and everybody knows about him. If children got lost at the market, there would be an announcement over the Tannoy, saying: 'The parents of so-and-so should come to the King Kong to collect their child.'"

He added: "It was very sad when we went to pick him up - he'd been damaged, so he had a lot of strapping on his arm, just as if he'd broken it."

In its heyday, Ingliston Market was renowned as being one of Europe's biggest outdoor markets, regularly boasting more than 2700 stalls and tens of thousands of shoppers every week.


I wish I had seen it in its heyday. Sigh. There are car boot sales in a parking garage in Edinburgh - I went to one once and it was horrid: stinking of petrol and cold and dingy. Yuck.

7 October 2005

:: orkney it is, then!

I'm going to be staying at The Noust for four nights, in the one-bedroom flat. It's only £25 a night, which is just great. The plan will be to drive up to probably Helmsdale the night before, then catch an earlyish ferry from Scrabster. The tricky part of travelling with Bertie is that I can't just do my usual thing of driving off without any bookings and just stop wherever looks nice. I have to find out in advance whether dogs are welcome. And I've stayed in some really rubbish places as a result. The first test of B&Bing with Bertie was a disaster - the room was so tiny and so crammed with furniture there was barely space for me, let alone him, his bed and his dishes; the door was directly opposite the front door, which opened straight on to a road busy with speeding traffic; and the resident dog was extremely unhappy at having an interloper on the premises. Nul points. A flat is ideal, however, because there is oodles of room for everything. Hurrah!

A five-day trip is good too, that way I can spend some time at home as well, tidying the garden, going out with friends and playing the guitar.

5 October 2005

:: plinketty plinketty plonk

I've got about five chords memorised on the guitar now, and am concentrating on changing from one to another without looking. Lots of discord. My fingertips are getting tender. Next week I'll phone the local guy who does lessons.

I'm also pondering where to go/what to do on my week off. I'm thinking of spending a few days in Orkney. I went there a long time ago, on a day trip from Inverness and have always meant to go back. The day trip was great - I went with Annmaree, who now lives in Melbourne. The coach left at some ungodly hour and drove us to John o' Groats, where we got a ferry across to South Ronaldsay. The coach that met us there whizzed us round a selection of Orcadian highlights: Skara Brae, the Italian chapel, the Ring of Brodgar, the Churchill Barriers. We didn't have time to do Maes Howe and I only got a brief scurry around St Magnus Cathedral. The only thing is that it's a very long drive from here - about nine hours according to Google Maps. But then they suggest driving 29 miles north from the pier at Scrabster, so there's probably a bit of search and rescue downtime factored in.

It's only seven and a half hours from John o' Groats, but that ferry doesn't run after September. And there's always the option of getting a ferry from Aberdeen - six hours on the boat, which would be pleasant for me but no fun at all for poor Bertie.

The alternative would be to spend the week at home, making day trips now and then and doing stuff like going out in the evening and getting the garden tidied up. I'm leaning towards Orkney, myself.

29 September 2005

:: michael, row the boat ashore ...

dreams

A few things meshed over the past week and voila! I have a guitar.

See, I have always longed to play a musical instrument. Last year I noticed a flyer in a local cafe window offering guitar lessons. Hmmmm, I thought, maybe I should take down the phone number. Then at the weekend I got my computer magazine through the post and the free CD included ... a Teach Yourself Guitar program. Finally, the day before yesterday there it was, in the "for sale" section of our electronic staff noticeboard, a Spanish guitar in mint condition, cost £140, selling for £50.

I collected it today - sadly minus the promised "Teach Yourself Guitar" books (the vendor's mum had given them to a charity shop. "Sarah could play Greensleeves, and you could tell what it was!"). But hey! I have the computer program. Which, marvellously, includes a tuner - you bong bong bong on the string in front of the microphone and the computer widget goes green when it's in tune. Ah, the miracles of technology. All tuned up, I was able to start strumming. I did three chords: simple G, simple C and G7. They are all strummed on just three strings. Tomorrow I progress to four-string strumming.

As far as I can tell it's a nice guitar.

I'm going to plug away at the computer lessons for a bit, but I think it would be useful to have lessons with a real person - I can't seem to get my fingers into the same positions as the man in the video clips.

The weather is crispening now we're almost into October, and the trees are turning. We are told this is going to be a severe winter and I wonder if that is related to the appearance of squirrels in the back yard. I've been feeding the birds for years, and last week had my first-ever squirrel. Within two days all my seed feeders had been destroyed, the little perches gnawed off. So now I've got squirrel-proof feeders with metal perches. The squirrel still gets fed - it tips the feeder sideways so the seed pours out. But at least the birds get some of it. Bertie is useless - this morning the squirrel AND a rabbit were chowing down in the garden while he lounged around upstairs. He deigned to look out the window but claimed he couldn't see anything.

munch munch munch

Time for squirrel-proof feeders

I had a housework blitz last weekend - most satsifying - but the garden has really fallen behind. The front doesn't look too bad - the lavender has done especially well this year and is just gorgeous to brush past - but the back is tragic. I'm planning to relocate the vege bed, but it seems like too big a chore at the moment. I've got a week off next month and may get stuck into it then, weather permitting. What I'd really like is a raised bed, like the ones Leighanne had at Waihola, but I remember her saying what an enormous effort it was to create them, and ... err, I'm too lazy. But it would be ggreat to have something high enough for me to work on in comfort and to keep Bertie from trampling everything. Oh, and where the vege bed is now, I'm going to put in some blueberry bushes. Yum. And maybe a plum tree up the back.

20 September 2005

:: liftoff

I haven't done the laundry or washed the dishes or the floor or the car, dusted, vacuumed, mowed the lawn or even made the bed, but I have established a wireless network connection between my two computers. [Cue thunderous applause] Thank you! Thank you! This is so unexpected ... I'd like to thank my bank manager, who made all this possible ...

It's autumn, suddenly. Have I been working on the computer for that long? I feel a bit like Rip Van Winkle.

The ivy outside the back door is in bloom and is a riot of wasps and flies. I must have a go at it with the clippers - two sneaky strands are trying to force their way into the livingroom.

There are squirrels in the back yard! I've lived here for five years now and it's the first time I've seen squirrels. It was just one to start with but word got around and now there are at least two. They hang upside down on the bird feeder, gorging on peanuts and seed. I'll have to get some squirrel-proof feeders - the poor birds are missing out. No pictures of squirrels yet - they flee as soon as I open the door. Bertie was excited at first, but less so now he realises he will never, ever catch one.

14 September 2005

:: I have a new boyfriend

I'm sleeping with the Ingliston gorilla

How gorgeous is he? Fwoar! I don't know why I didn't get a laptop long ago. I've wanted one for long enough - I nearly got one when my old computer blew up, at the end of last year, but ... well there was the trip to NZ and other stuff & in the end I had to economise. I decided I would wait until next year to get one, definitely. Then a few days later I was in Stockbridge and glanced in the window of the Sony shop ... and when I came to I was signing a credit card slip.

geektalk
It's not blisteringly fast, but it does have a TV card and built-in wireless & a big HDD (100Gb - annoyingly partitioned into two drives, and I didn't realise the small one was C: until I got a panicky error message saying I was nearly out of space ... "I'll just start deleting stuff, OK?" it squealed hysterically, while I yelled at it to shut up and started firing all my photo files over to the D: drive. Grrrrr. I now have to uninstall all my programs and reinstall them on D: How annoying), plus a docking station & good speakers. The screen is unbelievably good, much better than my telly, so it's fab for watching DVDs. I got a wireless setup too, which I'm going to have to finesse somewhat - the signal is allegedly "excellent" but I get a lot of disconnects. It may be the phone interfering. Or it could be that all the skirting boards and door frames in my house are cast iron. The old box is relegated to the spare room upstairs, where it sits rocking and sucking its thumb. I'm trying to set up a wireless network, but no joy so far ... the lappie won't share its stuff.
/geektalk

I can watch DVDs in bed! I can surf the net from the sofa! It's fab. I haven't tried taking it outside yet - the weather's been a bit too changeable - nor have I sat in a cafe pretending to write a bestseller. Hee hee!

In other news .... I don't know if I menationed, but I've started cooking Bertie's food. He's gone off tinned stuff almost entirely, apart from one flavour in one brand. Plus I got sick of the smell and washing out the tins for recycling. So now I get a big tub of whatever meat is cheap (today it was lean minced beef, last time it was turkey chunks) and cook it up with veg and stuff. Today it was elderly zuccini and pasta shells. I did the turkey with carrots and rice. He absolutely loves it! His favourite so far was liver porridge - liver is cheap as chips & so are oats, and he licked his bowl clean. He also gets a full serving of Greyhound Maintenance biscuits, which is enough to live on.

On Sunday I went to Fife for a walk, on a hill near the Scottish glding centre. It's a good place to walk because the gliders ride the thermals around the hill and they're wonderful to watch. They're so graceful and silent, like big birds. There were also a lot of paragliders launching from the top of the hill - a lot less graceful than the gliders, plus they were yelling at each other! It was a fairly gruelling climb - it's steep, plus I tried a shortcut and got scratched to pieces on gorse bushes, and it was hot, too. But very enjoyable. I had to keep Bertie on the lead because there were sheep. He was probably too hot and knackered to bother chasing them, but there's no knowing with him. We also had a walk at Loch Leven, which I thought would be nice and cooling for B - but it has blue-green algae, so I couldn't even let him have a drink, let alone a paddle.

Yesterday was spent mainly clearing up the clutter created in the course of setting up the new computer - it looked like I'd been burgled!

Big shout-out to Cathie and Bill in Christchurch: Cathie has just come through major surgery that could have knocked out her one remaining kidney - and she came through with flying colours! The kidney is ok, plus she was in and out of ICU in a day instead of the expected 3-4 days. What a trouper!

31 August 2005

:: a dog's life

This just in:

Dear Bertie,
What has happened to your mistress? As John might ask: has she given up on her bloke?
Did the cry-for-help knife wound turn septic, therefore hindering her typing ability? Has she spent all her time frivolously tootling around the glens in her whizzy new car and left herself no time for blogging? Has she fallen down and not been able to get up? Are you, Bertie, at this very moment, chewing the remains of her ulna to stay alive?
Yours bloglessly,
Cousin Margaret

Bertie's reply:
Hey there, cuzzy! We've been having fun. First of all Faye came to stay, she's my favourite visitor on account of lots of walks and cuddles and treats. She didn't stay long though, just a few days. Then Andrew came by, but that was just the one day, for two walks. Great to see him though. And then it was David and Donna staying! They are cool too - Donna says she loves me, and I love her too. No more visitors since then, but I live in hope. We have been for lots of rides in the new car. I like it apart from the windows, which whizz up too fast and sometimes hit me in the nose.

We've had some really good walks lately and I've got some cool new friends. Yesterday we went to Holyrood Park and I waded in the pond, got all muddy, ha ha. The weather's been too hot for chasing rabbits though.

Look at my new table! I love it:

Bertie loves his new feeding stand

There might be more to report soon. There's been some talk of a "new machine" - hope it's not one of these computer things, she already spends far too much time fiddling about with them.

This picture was on the screen today - anyone know what it is?

2 August 2005

:: cutting edge cuisine

emergency #1

I had a delicious dinner on Saturday night - spaghetti with an absolutely scrumptious sauce. I started cooking it at about 7pm and finally sat down to eat at just after half past midnight.

In between ... ?

It started with an olive. A black olive with a stone in the middle. The way not to stone an olive is to grip it in your left hand and slice it with a very sharp knife. The olive will slip from your fingers, the very sharp knife will keep going and you'll end up with a very nasty gash. In this case, across my thumb.

I eventually managed to stop the bleeding with a pile of paper towels, and after a little lie down (cold sweat, trembly knees, singing in my ears) I decided to try out NHS24, the new dial-a-nurse service. It was excellent! I learned that my nearest A&E Small Injuries Unit was too busy to take me before it shut at 9pm. The next nearest A&E was in Livingston, which I don't know at all, so I opted for the new Royal Infirmary. The nurse said she'd fax them my details, so off I went.

It was also very busy, Saturday being the night for disasters, and a cut thumb obviously isn't a high priority case. But there were plenty of magazines and plenty of interesting people, so the three hours I spent waiting went fairly quickly. By the time I got to a doctor the cut had started to seal up, so I didn't even have stitches, just steri-strips, a bandage and a tetanus injection.

ta dah!

It's still extremely painful, and the area between the cut and the thumbnail is numb. The doctor said that was ok, so long as the tip isn't numb it'll all settle down. The tetanus shot didn't hurt at the time but is now a big angry boil, like a giant insect bite.

Sunday I went to a lunch party at John & Penny's place, which was jolly. A former colleague was up from London with her daughter and it was nice seeing them again, plus there were other friends there I hadn't seen for a while. I also met lots of interesting new people, so it was a thoroughly good time all round. Oh, and the food was wonderful too.

I've been doing a bit of community volunteer work that's turning out to be interesting. A local livewire has organised a survey of what residents think of the town and what they'd like to see, and I've been helping type up the results in a spreadsheet organised by another livewire. The latest batch I did were teenagers, and it made slighty depressing reading. There isn't anything for them to do, they say, it's boring. So what do they like about the town? They like Tesco, McDonalds, Burger King. What would they like to see in the future? KFC, Pizza Hut and (wait for it) a theme park.

Later: I'm on to some grown-ups' survey sheets now, and they have a lot more to say about everything. The funniest teenager "dislike" was: "Too many police so you can't get into trouble". The elders, of course, would like many more police, on foot, patrolling the place at all hours. And something called "sequence dancing".

I started this the other day and put it away due to busy-ness, so I'd better publish it now or I'll never get it done. Work is just go go go the entire time these days, from when I arrive at about 4pm right through to 1am. Tonight I went to the pub for half an hour, but that's rare. At times I want to chuck it in and be a professional dog-walker. But Bertie can't afford to pay me, and I do quite like my posh new car, so I soldier on. At least it's interesting!

The Tattoo started tonight - and it was raining, of course. We've had a very dry, hot summer, but there were a couple of rainy days last week. "Tattoo weather," said one old hand, and so it is! Poor Festival visitors, I do feel sorry for them.